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tamjohn70's Blog


The Day Before

Posted by tamjohn70 , 08 July 2013 · 64 views

Today I am not having a good day. Sitting here wanting to cry and keep having thoughts of ending my life. Tomorrow is my therpay appointment so I recognize the day before the appointment I get like this. I really hate talking about the abuse, what is going on now in my life and why I see the world the way I do. I wish I could me normal, I wish I could c...


Faith and Fear

Posted by tamjohn70 , 07 July 2013 · 46 views

At forty-two I can say I survived sexual abuse, physical, emotional and verbal abuse. Also a survivor of suicide. These things are not all of who I am. When I read and hear stories of other survivors it makes me think of where I came from and what I do not want to be. I get scared. I do not want to be a living, walking, breathing victim anymore. See I am...


Child Within Me

Posted by tamjohn70 , 02 July 2013 · 48 views

I remember in one of my therapy appointments, my T asked me if I knew what my inner child wanted? My answer was I do not know, I lied. My T suggested I speak to her, that I have been doing. I do know with no doubt now what my inner child wants. She wants to be free, she wants to be able to speak the truth. She is tried of pretending everything was ok....



Posted by tamjohn70 , 01 July 2013 · 34 views

I have alot of thoughts of the past. My wish is to wake up and be normal, my wish is to one day be able to tell my family what happened. My wish is to not allow my past to control me. One day I won't be a victim I won't be a survivor I will be just like everyone else. Sharing my stories of a not so uncommon life.

We all have wishes and one day my...

July 2013


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