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I never have to see them (at school) again!

Posted by lotus~flower , 24 June 2013 · 168 views

The two boys who raped me graduated (ugh)...but now I never have to see them at school again!
I spent my entire junior year being scared every time I had to walk in the hallway or turn a corner. However, I'm so proud of myself for pushing through the stress and anxiety and continuing to attend my school.
I'm so glad that I won't ever have...


I Shouldn't Have to Justify Myself

Posted by lotus~flower , 07 May 2013 · 189 views

Sometimes I feel like no one really believes me and that I constantly need to justify/explain my rape.

I think this is mostly because my attackers go to my school, and they've told their own twisted lies to all of their friends, and all of those people believe them. I go to a school of about 200 people and unfortunately those boys are "popular...


Kickin Butt :)

Posted by lotus~flower , 05 May 2013 · 153 views

So a couple of days ago I got an anonymous message in tumblr pertaining to what happened to me. It caught me off Guard because I have neer really mentioned anything about it on social media and it was kind of offensive. So here is the question and my reply to it! Thought I'd share my moment of confidence with all of you! :yahoo: http://tmblr.c...


Toothpick Heart

Posted by lotus~flower , 28 April 2013 · 122 views

Toothpick Heart

Her heart
like the snap of a toothpick between two thumbs
like the death of a rose
each petal slowly wilting and falling
as the summer comes to an end.

All because of three words
said in a small room,
at first with comfortable wooden features,
but more chairs than people soon makes the room too crowded.
She could fill that...


Junior Prom

Posted by lotus~flower , 27 April 2013 · 111 views

I've never been into high school dances. They uually end up being pretty lame,
And I'd rather not spend money on a night filled with too-sweaty people ring too close to me.
I'm not going to Prom tonight because my attackers will be going as well. I'm joy terribly disappointed that I'm missing Prom; it was lame when I went last year, my...


via Poetry

Posted by lotus~flower , in Poems 26 April 2013 · 104 views

Recently I've found that poetry is a really good way for me to express how I'm feeling, so I've started doing it a bit more! Here is my first poem that I'm going to share with all of you:

An Unfamiliar Bed

I've slept on the same twin mattress all of my life
Through my favorite flannel sheets I feel the same diamond stitches roll...


Learning More...Sharing More?

Posted by lotus~flower , 24 April 2013 · 135 views

My boyfriend has always always been there for me. Before and after I was r**** and to this day he unconditionally supports and listens to me, and that means so, so much to me. That being said, we have never really talked about what exactly happened that night. He knows the general (who, what, where etc) but I've never gone into detail with him.



It's a Small World

Posted by lotus~flower , 22 April 2013 · 107 views

We started doing some drafts of college essays a while ago in my English class. I knew that I wanted to write about my SA but I didn't know if I was ready to have the college counselor know this. Luckily my English teacher knows what happened to me and I was able to talk to him about my possibilities.

I ended up turning in the paper about my SA desp...


Why is what has happened to us funny to so many people?

Posted by lotus~flower , 19 April 2013 · 124 views

It shocks me that people joke about r***. I understand that so many people in our culture accept these, and so many other insensitive jokes, "okay", but I don't understand how it is perpetuated. When will people start thinking before they speak?

Today I was on a bus with my Junior class today and I heard 3 jokes about r***. One was one of tho...

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