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Is this how my life is going to look like now?
My mum says my back pain is just in my head. Mum says I should get a life. Have a normal life like my brother or other girls at my age. I should get busy. Mum says I'm just feeling sorry for myself.
Mum, it's me Eve. Your daughter, remember? Mum I'm in pain. Mum it hurts.Why can't you just believe me? Remember when I was little and had massive headaches? You used to put your hand on my forehead and say you're taking the pain away from me. Can you please do this now? Please make it stop hurting. Please. Mum.
Went for a walk. And for the first time in my life I broke down. So there I was. In the middle of an Australian bush. Down on my knees. In the rain. Having my very own catharsis. My Polish tears soaking the red Australian earth. Crying for the first time in 14 years about what happened. Crying about the amount of pain I'm in. Crying about who I've become.
There I was. Instead of fighting and looking for answers I broke down. Who am I?
6hrs of chem. You can do it. Breathe. You're not stupid like they said. You're not weak like they said. You're not a failure like they said. You've made it that far. Keep going. It's up to you what you do with the time that's given to you. Study. Become who you want to be. Become the best MST therapist. Make your dream come true. Don't let anyone take it away from you this time!
Girl with a broken soul, heart with a gaping hole
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