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My Inability to Say "No"

05 April 2013
Posted by JDB  
Adverb - “A negative used to express dissent, denial, or refusal, as in response to a question or request.” Dictionary.com

No – such a little word with so much power, however, the abused seem to have no power to utter it when needed. My next confession is that I have an inability to say no.

I have been keenly aware that uttering this...
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Dealing With Depression

28 March 2013
Posted by JDB  
When I wrote about Rachel's battle with depression, it was really a confessional on my part. Just like her, it's been a constant battle on and off medication. Rachel states, [i]"When I think I’ve got the depression beat, I go off the pills and feel cheerful for a few months. Then stress, loneliness, and heartache take their toll...
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Posted by JDB  
Reposted from my Blog on Wordpress: Conflicting Hearts

[i]For most of my life, my self-esteem has been in the toilet. I’ve been back in therapy for almost two months. I know it’s not much, but I can say I think my self-esteem has made it to the toilet seat.”

He laughs. “Well, that’s...
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Posted by JDB  
The article I'm about to share with you deserves attention. I came across it this morning, "Obesity: An Insidious Effect of Childhood Trauma." Frankly, I'm not surprised this is true, but I'm surprised it's taken...
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Fears and Worries

05 January 2013
Posted by JDB  
[i]Note to Readers: This blog is connected to my WordPress blog regarding my fictional novel entitled "Conflicting Hearts," which is my story of childhood sexual abuse set into a story. It deals with the effects of abuse upon an adult woman's ability to have a healthy, loving...
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Tags: Childhood Sexual Abuse, Relationships, Effects Upon a Woman, Worry, Fear

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Posted by JDB  
Rachel is a complex person, who represents me and many others who have been sexually abused. The experience leaves us with coping mechanisms to protect ourselves when we feel threatened. Unable to keep healthy boundaries throughout life, I found myself constructing brick walls and disassociating myself from others when pressured. Here is...
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Tags: Brick Walls, Disassociation, Withdrawal, Coping Mechanisms, Relationships, Emotional Pain

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Believing in Love

23 December 2012
Posted by JDB  
My story of abuse was written into a fictional book. I created a character by the name of Rachel Hayward, who is really me in disguise. She embodies my fears, thoughts, beliefs, low self-esteem, and every other aspect of the effects sexual abuse had upon my life.

One of Rachel’s weaknesses, among other things, is her inability to believe in...
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