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My mind is on the one hand complex and rational able to make decisions based on facts, and on the other it reacts almost at a basic animal level when faced with a set of circumstances that trigger a response.
Trying to follow the former example I give above but sadly reacting via the latter, I've realised that I have to face my past if I am to have any sort of future as for the last 30 years quite frankly on and off I've simply existed, my outlook has been "at least at some point It'll be over, tried it but hated it". I've built up walls and live behind them, if I don't do something I'll be unable to climb back over them, if I were to give my life a colour it’s been very grey I guess. Don't get me wrong I've had some happy, memorable moments, mainly based around my kids, which is why I will see this out to the end even though for many, many years I'm not even sure that I've existed.
Trying to follow the former example I give above but sadly reacting via the latter, I've realised that I have to face my past if I am to have any sort of future as for the last 30 years quite frankly on and off I've simply existed, my outlook has been "at least at some point It'll be over, tried it but hated it". I've built up walls and live behind them, if I don't do something I'll be unable to climb back over them, if I were to give my life a colour it’s been very grey I guess. Don't get me wrong I've had some happy, memorable moments, mainly based around my kids, which is why I will see this out to the end even though for many, many years I'm not even sure that I've existed.
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