Pandora's Aquarium: paintinblue2013's Blog - Pandora's Aquarium

Jump to content

Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

There is still plenty of time and spaces if you'd like to sign up for the Guest Speaker Chat scheduled for this Saturday!

Welcome to Pandora's Aquarium, a rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivor message board and chat room.
If you've been a victim of any type of sexual violence, you belong here. What you see below represents just a fraction of the resources and survivor support available. Register now to join our community and take full advantage of what this online support group has to offer you as you heal and recover, or sign in to remove this message.

You are not alone, we can support you as you heal, and you've made an important step toward recovery by reaching out. If you are unable to register or have any questions, please contact the staff or view our home page.

Guest Message © 2013 DevFuse

 

Just lacking Hope

16 November 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
Im feeling extra down today.. I don't know if it cus it is closer to the court date, or maybe just the holidays. I just feel so hurt. Hurt by my family, that they don't support me, or are there for me. I am hurt by society and the way rape victims are treated. I hate feeling like I did something wrong. I feel so miserable. I often just...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 2 Comments

Heres my Story

15 November 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
Here is the sum of my story... This may sound really stupid, but I've been raped four times in one life time.
It began as a child, I was 4 and had a uncle, (who is still married to my aunt) who abused me as a child. I don't remember much of the abuse, there are memories that come back, and intrusive thoughts I tried to block out of my...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

ON the Brain

24 September 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
I hate that some much of dating is about sex. I hate having to feel like I have to sex with the people that date me. I hate feeling like I am obligated and I hate how guys don't stop about it until they get what they want. Its so annoying and it makes me feel really bad about myself. I used to not be so weird about sex. It wasn't a big...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

After the Over Shock

18 September 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
For the last couple of months I think my emotions have been more stable. This is often the part of me that seems to go into over drive in trying to understand what and why someone would go to the extent of trying to purposely hurt another individual. It bothers me that this guy gets away with what he did and that even if I did everything correctly...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Where I Blame My Self

15 September 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
I never really thought that things I couldn't remember would ever come to haunt me. I think this is often where the worst of the in how the PTSD effects myself. It is the flashbacks to events in which triggered my mind to a place in which I was completely helpless. In my moments of weakness which was a result of boundaries being broken,...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Fooling Each Other

15 September 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
I know I know, I have been selfish and pushed you away…

I know I made

Mistakes but I told you how I felt from the start…I

Tried to harden my heart and god won’t let me do this… I just

Need to know what

Really happened. I changed my eyes blue and still I

Never hear from you

I want a chance… but if this chance was never there

If I was wrong...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Reflections in what I see

15 September 2012
Posted by paintinblue2013  
It is difficult for me not to reflect on my past. I often spend hours day dreaming of what was and how it could have been different. As a child, my siblings and I often talked about never talking about what happened at home with anyone. There was a fear about splitting up the family even if it could have been for the better. We watch as our Mother...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

 
Back to blog home →
  • 3 Pages +
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3

← May 2013 →

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
192021 22 232425
262728293031 

Recent Entries

My Blog Links

Mark Blog as read
Archive

Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.