i guess its getting better?
If better means I still have nightmares.
If better means I still have triggers and flashbacks
and tears that I feel I should not shed.
I guess life is getting better if that means
we avoid talking about what happened to me
in fear of me hiding in a dark lonely corner
sulking my own despair and guilt away.
I guess I am getting better or
maybe I'm just getting better about hiding my feeling
from everyone so they can stop feeling uncomfortable around me.
So they can stop thinking just get over it and move on.
As if they understood. If it was so easy I would have done it a long time ago.
But in the eyes of my husband and my family I am getting better.
Little do they know that is far from the truth.