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I've been borrowing money from my mom for bills and basic things that I should have taken care of. Today I realized an overdraft charge left me short on my phone bill, so I had to reach out to my Dad. He asked about my budgeting and I had to explain that i'm using the university's services to deal with something that happened to me a long time ago, and that costs more than I expected.
He didn't press, he just asked me if i'm in contact with my mom, and if there's anything else he can do to help. I'm so grateful for the way he responded. He let me order pizza with his credit card so i'm waiting for the delivery outside my building.
I'm so thankful for my parents. I just wish I could reach out to them better and explain what's wrong with me. I feel like a little girl crying for her mommy and daddy.
Okay. I know i'm not supposed to drink with my meds. Definitely not when I have an exam in the morning. Maybe i'm a little buzzed right now. So what? Sometimes I choose coping methods that aren't healthy. Maybe sometimes those are the only options that work. It's been a long time since I drank at all. Today I felt like I was ready to shut down. I just needed something to keep me going.