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Gotta start somewhere...

Posted by ptsdthrowmeaway , 07 August 2012 · 26 views

I'm in therapy and on medication, but sometimes I still feel stuck. I'm trapped running in place. I think it's important for me to reach out when I feel like this, so that I can keep moving forward instead of taking steps backwards. That's why I joined this online community.

I don't even know where to start sharing my story. Every board that pertained to my incident made my head spin. I can never find a story that's like mine though. It makes me wonder whether I belong here. Do I deserve the comfort and support that other people need so badly? If I can't remember the actual experience, even though I know it happened, doesn't that mean I was anesthetized and I don't deserve to complain as much?

Even so, I have been in a lot of pain lately. Writing has been kind of therapeutic recently, so I thought maybe I should start with a blog. I have created journals of my memories and experiences. Many people might find these entries to be obscene and profane, so I completely understand if my post is removed or if I am banned from using the blogs. I would like everyone to know that there may be a very high trigger warning for the rest of my blog. I'm sorry for anyone who feels pain from reading this, and I will delete any post as soon as requested.

I hope I can reach out into the forums soon. I want to stress that I'm using this blog as a way to get acquainted with this community and to learn how to express myself.

Thank you for your support
~Space



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Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.