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Every year at Christmas time my mom would go nuts. Truly, completly basketville. She was stressed and miserable from mid November untill the end of the hoildays. She did it every year, it was so much a part of Christmas around our place that belive it or not I find that I am actually missing it.
If you had of asked me last year if this was something I would miss I would have said "Are you Kidding, I can't wait to never have to do it again". and now crazy as it sounds, I really miss her nutsness.
I know that this is just one aspect of the first Christmas with out her, and that next year will be better but... right now, just this minute I feel like I need my head examined.
I feel like even though the house is ready and the presents are bought, that it is not truly christmas, that I can't be ready because, the presure is missing. That with out some crazy woman bursting into tears, panic attacks, and silent hostility, it is just not the holidays. I thought about doing it my self... but figured what the hay lets try something new this year :reindeer:/>
If you had of asked me last year if this was something I would miss I would have said "Are you Kidding, I can't wait to never have to do it again". and now crazy as it sounds, I really miss her nutsness.
I know that this is just one aspect of the first Christmas with out her, and that next year will be better but... right now, just this minute I feel like I need my head examined.
I feel like even though the house is ready and the presents are bought, that it is not truly christmas, that I can't be ready because, the presure is missing. That with out some crazy woman bursting into tears, panic attacks, and silent hostility, it is just not the holidays. I thought about doing it my self... but figured what the hay lets try something new this year :reindeer:/>
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Beautiful. Good on you for breaking the cycle, yet good on you for missing the crazy too.
ChoosingLife,
12 December 2012 - 03:24 PM
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Trigger Warning
This Blog contains real words, detailed descriptions, and raw content. Please be aware that some people may find certain elements disturbing or triggering. I urge you to be mindful of that fact, and proceed with caution
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