I am just tired of getting so bummed and ashamed and disappointed from people (family) because of their actions. My T and I talked about at the last session that I tend to have the fantasy hopes, like deep down I want them to change when in reality it will not happen. I did admit to T that when good things happen like landing the internship a few months ago, I think of unresolved family stuff and it just kills my mood.
I am just hoping that this move is a good way for a fresh start. Since this past winter, it has been a challenge from dealing with burning out and getting anxiety and letting the stress and worries trouble me so much. I guess burning out is one of the worst and best things that happened to me because I am still learning that it is okay to say that I am not okay. I have been really emotional since dad relapsed a month after I graduated high school and started recalling flashbacks of the abuse from brother. So, it has been just overwhelming and I guess I am learning how to take control without my parents (family) help.