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So, once again I am home on weekends due to school assignments but I do not mind since it is screenwriting. However, just as my mother was leaving to go to a friend's bday party, she says that "Your brother is coming done to pick up some stuff from his bedroom. Don't say or do anything." I had a gut feeling that something was up since I had overheard her yelling on phone. Of course, I did not say anything but I refused to give her a goodbye kiss and turned away. She started yelling, saying that she does not know why everyone thinks she is the bad guy. I told her that I did not even say that and to not blame me for whatever my abusers said to her.
Anyway while she walked out to leave, I told her that the reason why she feels the way she does is because she ignores and is in denial of everything.
So now, I am on the f****** lookout ti see if my "brother" is stopping by. I am just really annoyed and do not want any trouble but let's be honest, I guess I have had my head stuck up my a** too long.
I do want to confront him, if he is alone unless my father comes along to be his "guard," to ask if he was ever sexually abused by someone since it seems as though NOBODY sexually takes advantage of one-especially their own blood-unless they were molested/raped/taken advantage of themselves.
I just want to focus on my priorities because I am just sick of the bowl sh** drama.
UPDATE: They just showed up and WOW my dad has the fucking nerve to stand on front lawn with a small dog. I have been in my room since I cannot bear to look at my "innocent" brother but jeez I am a bit shocked since the last time my dad came to the front door was a week after my grandpa's death, trying to come into my mom's house. I want to call the cops but I sense that he will eventually have to come to ugly terms at the end of his lifetime. I am praying as much as I can to forgive them. I do not want to hate these people nor myself. I know it is a process.
Anyway while she walked out to leave, I told her that the reason why she feels the way she does is because she ignores and is in denial of everything.
So now, I am on the f****** lookout ti see if my "brother" is stopping by. I am just really annoyed and do not want any trouble but let's be honest, I guess I have had my head stuck up my a** too long.
I do want to confront him, if he is alone unless my father comes along to be his "guard," to ask if he was ever sexually abused by someone since it seems as though NOBODY sexually takes advantage of one-especially their own blood-unless they were molested/raped/taken advantage of themselves.
I just want to focus on my priorities because I am just sick of the bowl sh** drama.
UPDATE: They just showed up and WOW my dad has the fucking nerve to stand on front lawn with a small dog. I have been in my room since I cannot bear to look at my "innocent" brother but jeez I am a bit shocked since the last time my dad came to the front door was a week after my grandpa's death, trying to come into my mom's house. I want to call the cops but I sense that he will eventually have to come to ugly terms at the end of his lifetime. I am praying as much as I can to forgive them. I do not want to hate these people nor myself. I know it is a process.
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I did not say anything but I refused to give her a goodbye kiss and turned away. She started yelling, saying that she does not know why everyone thinks she is the bad guy. I told her that I did not even say that and to not blame me for whatever my abusers said to her. That paragraph you wrote is so similar to my own life, I totally relate. My mother is the exact same way.
I also agree with what you wrote about not wanting to hate anyone. Forgiveness is what we should all seek to achieve, for our own good, but I know it can be incredibly hard sometimes. I haven't reached that point with my uncle, and I don't know if I ever will.
Sending you positive energy anf hugs if okay