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Ryan

Posted by lost.dancer , 14 October 2012 · 15 views

Alone... thatís all that I feel. Lost in life wondering around in circles screaming for help but no one answers my call. It hurts, watching people, passing by in life smiling, while Iím crying, dying inside from the hurt, the pain that rips me apart limb from limb until there is nothing left but scraps of flesh and bone. Bits and pieces of my soul spread out and put on display for the world to see. I wonder what itís like to be on the outside looking in. Not knowing the pain, can they see it? Is the problem that itís not visible to the outside? Yet Iím not sure if it really matters at all. I wish I could forget what they did, how it felt, how I feel now. Remove it from my mind, but yet it had become a part of me, a part that makes me stronger while still breaking me down. I am vulnerable, I hate it. While they touched me over and over and over again in my mind, you watched, as they beat me down years later. Tortured me with their memories, you held me close and promised to never let go. You promised to never let you, you promised to always be by my side, yet you lied through and through. WHY? That all that keeps coming up keeps resonating through my head I try to tune it out but it only plays louder, why did I listen to you, why did I believe you? This much I may never understand what I thought was love was a false face to deceit. What did I do wrong this time? All I ever remember sayingÖ why was I not good enough.



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