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Dying inside, that what it feels like. Every time my anxiety comes back i just want to hide. Its almost as if i am watching myself freakout. I know whats going on around me but i cant control how i am responding. I know there is no reason to be anxious but i cant help it. My boyfriend seems to think that i have all the answers to my problem. That i can turn it on and off like a light switch. But it doesnt work that way. Last time this happened my grades went down the drain and i really cant afford for that to happen again. So i know i need to keep going. I cant just hide in my room for a week hoping that this feeling will go away. I use to use SI and drinking to releave my itch, but i don't want to go back down that road. I cant do it again. Im just, well as i said before...lost.
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