I need to keep going forward
I look at my home and I can't believe how messy it is. It's 1:30 in the morning and I am up typing when I should be sleeping. I know that would be the healthy choice to make. That what would be best for me to do.
Started watching the last temptation of Christ and now I am diving headlong into my abyss. I feel the anger coming on towards myself, why, why why.
Trying to get back to my what seemed to be a real insight on being a survivor and all that that means. I was feeling great but now it's like whatever.
So what am I doing now. Typing to a computer screen, shaking my head telling myself things that are not very nice. I need to shake this complete and utter bullshit that I put myself through all to often. Where did it start. At what point after my last blog did I start to lose it. Who knows...........Whatever