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I wish people were naturally trustworthy, I've always been a trusting person, and I put my faith in anyone, because everyone deserves a chance. Until it happened, i shut everyone out, Now, I find it hard, because my natural instinct is to trust, but my trust has been misused in a major way now,more than ever before. People that I trust now, it takes a lot, and if it's broken, it's lost. My best friend, we've been friends for years, and although she doesn't know exactly what happened, she supports me. She knows something's wrong, yet she doesn't force me to share, and helps me in whichever way she can. Until recently, she did a horrible thing and in doing it, has lost my respect and trust. I'm broken, she means the world to be, but now she's shaken me so badly I don't want to trust anyone. I second guess everything everyone says. Just like before. Just as I thought I was beginning to regain trust in people. But if you can only trust yourself.. What a lonely world we would live in ;/
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Having read what you blogged, it's obvious you still believe in trust. That endears me to you as I find that to be a wonderful quality. I'm not sure what your friend said or did, but I do know that those we love and trust most have the ability to hurt us most of all. We all have the ability to hurt others, especially when we can't see past our own pain. Perhaps try putting yourself in her shoes. Ask yourself, what is it she said or did that made you lose trust and respect in her... I hope that helps a bit.
I've felt this way on many occasions and it often happens when I divulge too much. I try to let go, forgive and talk it out with the person, but oftentimes it has ended what I considered a good friendship. Perhaps, I'm the one to blame for putting too much trust in someone too soon. Yet, I love that about myself. I want to trust and give of myself. Still, I do exercise some hesitance. Oh dear...I hope that makes sense.
Good luck!
Ciao...xo,
Szilvia