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A bit of an update I guess...

Posted by broken.in.silence. , 08 March 2012 · 138 views

So I have been going to counseling lately and I feel really good about it. About three weeks ago I got a tattoo of a light blue heart on my wrist to remind me why I have gone on for as long as I have when I get really depressed or just need something to give me a smile on my face. When I told my dad, he was fine with it. However, when I told my mom, she essentially hung up on me and ignored me for a week. Not going to lie, it royally sucked and really upset me. Now she acts like everything is fine and we are on with normal life. I am going home tomorrow and I am a little nervous about how she will react to actually seeing the tattoo. But a part of me doesn't even care what she thinks anymore. Like my counselor said, I have finally accepted my mom for whom she is; she just isn't the mom that I wanted her to be. I hope that through counseling I will learn how to handle my mom's reactions to a majority of what I do in life; I will never fully please my mother but sometimes that is just how it is. I was sick the first three weeks of classes and my grades are currently suffering for it so that is quite a damper, but I have been working on getting the motivation to go to class and try my hardest so that I can succeed. There is also a new guy that I met and he is really cool and I think we are going to be hekka good friends, and possibly more. But right now I feel like that isn't something I can afford to worry or think about because I need to do better in my classes. I was denied a job for next year so that kind of sucks but I was put in an alternate position so there is still a little bit of hope! And I guess that is pretty much all for now. Have a good night! *hug*

you can't always please your parents. I have a couple tattoos, and my parents definitely weren't huge fans when I got them years ago, but now that time has passed, I have gotten older, etc, they're not an issue. it's hard because I think no matter what there is always a part of me that wants to please them but in order to be your own person and do what makes you happy you have to push through that. and if the tattoo reminds you to smile that's great!
Apr 18 2012 12:12 AM
I feel the same way, like I want to please my parents but I know that that won't make me happy because I don't think that I will every fully please them, at least one of them. It's just a sucky feeling...

August 2015

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