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None of them care about me. They scarcely even bother to make the pretense. I guess that makes them a little less hypocritical than if they pretended to care... But I would be lying if I didn't admit that it still stings a bit. I know I deserve better than that. I bend over backwards for the people in my life, it's part of my personality of needing to people-please. (a quality that made it easier for my uncle to molest me no doubt) I want to be liked and wanted, but when it comes to my family I know that won't ever happen. How is a person supposed to have a sense of self-worth and good self-esteem when their OWN FAMILY doesn't care if they live or die?
I don't know where to go from here. I thought that by moving back to my hometown that I would be able to build a life for my daughter and raise her around my family. I thought maybe it presented an opportunity to bring everyone closer together, but that hasn't happened. People just resent my presence, and they all just want to isolate themselves as usual. I feel like a ghost here, like someone who doesn't belong and who is invisible....