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Finally told a therapist for the first time what happened

16 March 2012
Posted by Irishleo 
Well I finally did it. This week I had an appointment with a therapist and for the first time told a person (outside of my family or my pandora's blog) that I was raped and molested as a child. It was liberating. I hadn't planned on revealing it necessarily as I was there discussing other problems, but as we spoke she actually asked me outright. (I had been talking about how afraid I am that someone will hurt my daughter)

At first I spoke matter of factly, but as she probed for details I found myself choking and struggling to speak before finally bursting into tears. But it felt so cathartic, like I was releasing some of the pain out of me.

I'm not sure what other people have experienced the first time they told a therapist, but my lady asked so many detailed questions that after a while I started to wonder if it was morbid curiousity on her part or whether she genuinely needed to know. I guess it doesn't really matter though, since talking about it ultimately helped me. I just wondered if that was what most therapists do.

It feels like now I am one step closer to being able to confront my main abuser. I am tired of living in fear.

 
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5 Comments On This Entry

That's amazing. Mine also asks many detailed questions, she says it is to help with desensitization
iris, 16 March 2012 - 08:52 PM
Good for you! :hi5:

I know what you mean about it feeling cathartic. Telling someone like that (someone safe, but also someone who's outside of your family) is/can be a release and a relief.
Kyrie, 16 March 2012 - 10:05 PM
sending you strength---that was so brave. I hope the work you do with the T will help you continue to heal
gillybeans, 16 March 2012 - 10:19 PM
It is so liberating to tell...I also experienced that flood of relief when I began to tell people my story after 30 years. Many therapists use many different methods. My T does not ask any details because she feels it is more important to focus on the feelings and emotions associated with the abuse than the disturbing details. BUT that is not to say your T method is wrong...just different from my T. THE MOST important is that you feel safe with your T and that you feel she is doing EVERYTHING in your best interest. If she continues to ask questions that even make you wonder why she is asking...you should ask her why she asks. That is your right if you have any questions about the process of healing that is for YOUR benefit!
might4right, 17 March 2012 - 06:08 AM
Thank you all so much for your responses and your support. I cannot describe enough how grateful I am to you and to all the kind people on pandora's aquarium who are helping me in my journey towards healing. Sending you all hugs :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Irishleo, 17 March 2012 - 07:06 PM
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