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I put on a good act most of the time, but I really want to scream at the top of my lungs. I have no idea what I'd scream, but whatever... I'm sick of people treating me like an idiot at work. I'm not an idiot.
I'm tired of feeling like a freak. I've never felt normal. I feel way too damaged for the mild abuse I suffered. I wonder if I'm this messed up because of the age I was when it happened or because it was swept under the rug or both... I just know there are people out there who have been through much worse and still seem to be a whole person instead of this partial person that I am. There are aspects of life that I completely ignore and shut out. I am not a whole person. Part of me is dead.
I'm tired of pretending.
I wonder if this means my meds are no longer working for me? Not that I intend to do anything about it, that would require finding a new doctor. Yuck.