Clemsta's Blog

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Your face

07 October 2012

Posted by Clemsta

Still there, still making a appearance in my dreams.
Still throwing me off track when it all seems to go well.
Reminding it all happened.
I KNOW IT DID.
Hence I can't settle down or go near another man.
Hence I trust no one.
Think its time you fucked off.
Sick of this shit, over and over again.

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What's wrong with the world? (sorry if triggers)

02 September 2011

Posted by Clemsta

WORLD IS A MESS
So fed up of hearing about child abusers and rapists everyday on the radio.
People corrupting and hurting innocent children... why can't people just leave them alone???

GROOMING, ABUSING AND RUINING LIVES

Just heard a story about a police man being sent to jail for possessing 54,000 indecent images...

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Such a mess...

31 August 2011

Posted by Clemsta

I'm a mess, feel like I'm falling apart...
I should be happy and looking forward and moving forward with my life, I got into University for goodness sake!!! After so much effort and an extra year of trying!

Felt like things where getting better... me and the bf all good, the dreams where at bay... then two...

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I'm scared...

01 August 2011

Posted by Clemsta

Eergh...
such a moron. Going to loose my :heart:

M if I don't "chill my beans" and stop worrying all the fucking time.
It's like because I missed out on so many years thanks to HIM I've regressed back to a child... I over react to the littlest thing, make all kinds of scenarios in my head until its something that...

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HOW DARE YOU

28 July 2011

Posted by Clemsta

[b]How fucking dare you tell a little 16 year old what happened to me.
A 16 year old girl who you barely know,
Your 27 FFS, you shouldn't be texting some little girl at all, saying how rough stuff is and fuel her obvious crush on you.
Clearly you love the attention and affection.
HOW DARE YOU, what happened to me isn't something to go...

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WHY WHY WHY

26 July 2011

Posted by Clemsta

He's still here, thought he'd moved away, far away from me. But he's HERE...

Now I'm looking over my shoulder expecting him to be watching me with those brown eyes that use to watch me everyday...

Part of me wants to find you and fall into your arms, but only because you programmed me to... like...

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I want to...

22 July 2011

Posted by Clemsta

I want to
Take his eyes out
for looking at me
Yes I do
I want to take his hands off
for touching me
Yes I do

And I want to rip his heart out
for hurting me
And I want to break his mind down
Yes I do

And I want to make him regret
life since the day he met me
Yes I do
And I want to make him take back
All that he took from me
Yes I do

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Just smile

20 July 2011

Posted by Clemsta

Just smile,
keep smiling for everyone else's benefit,
just smile even if you feel like screaming and tearing your hair out,
don't want them to know how deeply it hurts,
just smile and hold the mask in place,
they can't know that everyday is a struggle,
just smile and keep them believing your fine,
one day the smile will be real. One...

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