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YoursTruly's With Love



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To Just Be

Posted by YoursTruly , 11 January 2013 · 97 views

Since my last entry I have just completely shut down and isolated myself from things just so that I can give my mind and heart a break. I've screened phone calls for individuals trying to reach me, haven't signed into many of my social sites and limited my time around my family for roughly a month. And I am glad that I did. I feel as though my fee...


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Keep it Moving

Posted by YoursTruly , 25 November 2012 · 50 views

I haven't really been feeling much pain lately. The numbness I once felt is easing into a dull ache of what I am assuming what I didn't want to feel, but need to feel in order to function the way that I want to in the world. I am finally freeing myself from the choke-hold stagnancy I have been feeling for some time now. It leaves me weak and light...


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Wrong One

Posted by YoursTruly , 23 October 2012 · 86 views

So I think this Monday I finally had the breakdown that I had been trying to avoid, but feel at the same time. Once I stopped trying to control when and how it was going to happen, a chance trigger by my now ex-boyfriend's roommate would send me on a path of deep frustrated sorrow and anger from Monday night to today. For once I actually cried for mys...


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Reboot

Posted by YoursTruly , 13 October 2012 · 79 views

So for the past few days I can't even say that I have been like myself, whatever that is. All I know is I was super stressed with the demands of school, work and home and then the next minute my mind just cracked and my mind and actions just said fuck it all, excuse my language.

I am freeing myself from all the chaotic madness! I can't take a...


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Honestly

Posted by YoursTruly , 07 October 2012 · 82 views

Dear Skeletons,

I want to hate you. With everything that I am I want to hate you. When you come around me, when you think of me, I want you to feel the fire of my rage. I would like for your sleepless nights to be filled with every tragic transgression you've done me. I'd hope that on those nights your dreams would be filled with the graphic imag...


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Exhaling

Posted by YoursTruly , 24 September 2012 · 31 views

I don't know but for some of you this entry may be hard to read, as it is my intention to be as open and honest as my shaky hands will let me. I will do my best to indicate areas of this entry where it may difficult to read. But to be clear this article will delve into all aspects of my assault history.

For the past few months and the last few entrie...


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Whirlwind

Posted by YoursTruly , 08 April 2012 · 30 views

I feel like I can't breathe sometimes and all I want to do is cry my eyes out.

I've recently had what can only be explained as the worse trigger I've ever had in my experience EVER. I was talking with a friend after going out with my boyfriend and a few mutual friends and the topic lead back to my previous relationship and my friend's exp...


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Make It Stop

Posted by YoursTruly , 07 March 2012 · 31 views

I only feel hurt right now. I'm off for break at school and only have my internship this week, which is only a two day thing and nothing else. I've done some journal-ing and re-reading old entries. I've even reread some of the blog posts I've made on here. And I can't help but wonder: where did all of my hope go? Where did all of my fi...


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Beyond Upset

Posted by YoursTruly , 26 February 2012 · 35 views

This morning I woke up with a killer headache and feeling angry. There is so much rage I don't know what to do with it. The last time I felt like this was when I almost ran over my abuser with my car. I blacked out when I saw him in the parking lot of my school and he walked away from me like he saw a ghost. And it was a then mutual friend that notice...


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Chaos Be Still

Posted by YoursTruly , 24 February 2012 · 35 views

So I had my first T session in nearly a month and unfortunately that whole day just went up in flames for me. The rottenness of it sort of sparked from the day before when I had one anxiety attack and two separate panic attacks. The anxiety attack coming from me suspecting that a random car sitting outside my house for half an hour only to drive off after...






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