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ties and consent

Posted by anji13 , 12 July 2011 · 22 views

i slam the door
set on letting this be
the world has no forgiveness
for these binds and games

he picks me up and ties the ropes
is this a joke
anything to keep my soul down
when i agreed this knife
had no where to go

i shouldn't need this
you think you know me
you think you own me
wait til the end of this
i own my cries my pain
i will not break for you

cuffs swell black and blue
pinching and bleeding
yet i didnt say no
never screamed through the gag

i want to take a picture
make me remember
that i did this
i agreed
to feel something real
even if its just blood and pain

and he screams in my ear
you're mine

you think you know me
you can't even touch me
not my core not my soul
because mine is long dead

he lifts the mask
I wanna die, I wanna die i cry
yet i was the willing
i have no air for arguing
its only my body
i am letting him steal

now is my hour
to say these goodbyes
to a face who doesn't care
and doesn't mind cutting me
breaking me

but i won't cry
i won't scream if i think
i might die
with every whip and cut
every time i let this happen

i remember
i feel that child again
deep inside of me somehow still alive
she knows
she understands
even if i don't

walking away i am swollen
broken but untouched
is it worth living
if i can barely feel everyday
anything anymore
and i let it happen
i let them tie me
chain me
gag me
let me keep me
use me
taste me

their control on me sets me free
cant you understand

September 2014

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