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With everything that I disclosed to you in our sessions, did you even ask Dr. L if I could have been triggered into a flashback? Did you ask him at what point did I become aggitated and aggressive?
It may have appeared I was out of control...but the situation was out of control as wel.
I had been triggered badly by the rent-a-cops & by being ordered to remove my clothing.
having me locked in a cell with country blue floors, shure as hell didn't ease my anxiety/panic level. Being searched, stripeed and placed in an empty room with nothing but a matress didn't help me much either.
I feel I've been betrayed by you. I called you from the ER to assist and help explain my reactions and instead was suggested to 302 me. AFTER I had already signed the 201.
What I don't comprehend is why the nursing staff were fighting for me, but my own therapist wouldn't? They know and I knew I needed to talk to someone right away, but 302 wasn't the route to go.
Prior to all of this, I had never believed in therapy because I always had a difficult time trusting people. Somehow you slipped thorugh the cracks in myw all, and I began to trust you....and that is what you did with it?
You decided to lock me up with alcholoics, drug addicts, schizo's and even a few self-proclaimed prostitutes. So. That is how you view me? I'm not much better than that? If you'll have me, I would like to continue working with you but you need to realize the trust I had in you has been broken and needs rebuilt again.
How am I supposed to trust my own instincts now? That was the one thing of myself that I had confidence in and now it's clouded by doubt.
So I ask you.....Now what? Where do WE go from here?