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"I'm Fine. I always am"
One of my memories specifically about that phrase.
Spoiler
He held my head over the bathtub under water while he permitted one of his friends to r*p* me. Anytime he allowed me to come up for air, He would whisper it in my ear to say it as loud as I could before I would go back under. If I didn't say it, he would hold me under longer than he had the time before. I think what botheres me the most about that memory is the fact that it doesn't bother me at all that I was being used by his friend.
He was trying to make me see he was in control if I lived or not. I can still hear him screaming in my ear "JUST SAY IT...SAY IT."
That type of assault happened more than once, but not more than 4 times. Probably sounds like alot to you....once or more I mean, but some of the things he had done to me on a daily basis so i lost count after a while. That was something that was "special".
This memory keeps creeping into my head and I can't seem to get past it. Gave the kids a bath tonight and had a bad memory. Not quite a flashback, but my stomach turned quite violently.
Thanks for listening.
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