Today I stirred up some strange old feelings. The first time I was inpatient in summer of 2006 (that time was specifically for my anorexia) I had a roomate I instantly clicked with. She had suffered from the disorder for years longer than I had, but, like me, was determined to stay positive and to beat it. Everyone on the ward thought of us as "The cheerleaders" because we would be constantly affirming everyone else, giving out stickers, making recovery posters..sounds kind of silly now but at the time it helped. Shortly after leaving treatment I lost touch with her, I was trying to focus on my own recovery and let myself fall out of touch from everyone in the ward...I always felt bad about it but I knew she would understand. Anyways, its been almost 5 years and I just decided to google her/ look her up on facebook. I was almost afraid I wouldn't find her or find an obituary...but to my surprise I found out she got married, had a baby (i think, from pictures)(doctors thought the ED had ruined her reproductive system! I was so happy for her) and she graduated nursing school (her dream). So that was really really really great to see and a little bittersweet, I miss her and I miss that special bond we had that year but I don't think I should reach out to her..don't want to open old wounds on both our parts..i don't know...I'm just happy she was able to accomplish everything she wanted. And you know what, I recovered too. And I went back to school and finished and have had 3 dream jobs in my field since graduated. So I did it too. I hope somehow she knows what a motivator she was for me. This is making me a little emotional. I don't know if I should go with it or just stop thinking about it.
Anyways, I think I will go to bed early tonight.