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I just don't know what to do anymore. I have no one to actually talk to about this. My friends and family say they are there for me but every time I try to talk to them, they don't know what to say or try and focus on something else (especially my dad and one of my best friends). I know they mean well, but I wish I could receive the same advice or encouragement that I give them.
Everything has been going wrong it seems this entire year so far. Only maybe 5 days tops have been good so far. The financial troubles suck; there was even a few points where me and a few members of my family that were staying with me couldn't eat for a few days cause the money just wasn't there last month.
School isn't letting up either. I never took a break from school after the assault and I only have this semester to bring up my grade or else I will get kicked out of my major =/... I go to my adviser, but I mentioned to her that I've been going through a lot and asked if it would help if I discussed it with her and she told me she didn't want to hear it (well she just quickly said "that's okay don't say anything" before I could even complete my statement) =/ I'm still trying my best to keep my head up and do my best in my classes of course...
Today, I had such a bad flash/dream that I couldn't even stay the whole day at school. I have been sick to my stomach and still do. I think yesterday was the thing that triggered the dream cause I had to walk through the area where I first met "him" to get to different hotels to apply for jobs. >< It was nerve-racking...
I'm also scared for the upcoming trial against "him" too. Its soon and I don't know what to expect of course... I just hope the justice system will b on my side...
I just have been telling myself that "something's got to give". There has to be some time an extended period of happiness will happen...
Everything has been going wrong it seems this entire year so far. Only maybe 5 days tops have been good so far. The financial troubles suck; there was even a few points where me and a few members of my family that were staying with me couldn't eat for a few days cause the money just wasn't there last month.
School isn't letting up either. I never took a break from school after the assault and I only have this semester to bring up my grade or else I will get kicked out of my major =/... I go to my adviser, but I mentioned to her that I've been going through a lot and asked if it would help if I discussed it with her and she told me she didn't want to hear it (well she just quickly said "that's okay don't say anything" before I could even complete my statement) =/ I'm still trying my best to keep my head up and do my best in my classes of course...
Today, I had such a bad flash/dream that I couldn't even stay the whole day at school. I have been sick to my stomach and still do. I think yesterday was the thing that triggered the dream cause I had to walk through the area where I first met "him" to get to different hotels to apply for jobs. >< It was nerve-racking...
I'm also scared for the upcoming trial against "him" too. Its soon and I don't know what to expect of course... I just hope the justice system will b on my side...
I just have been telling myself that "something's got to give". There has to be some time an extended period of happiness will happen...
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