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he wants nothing to do with me.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 05 August 2013 · 81 views

i finally told him that i'm pregnant. i knew he wouldn't be happy, but i didn't expect him to be so angry. it's really out of character for him. this is the first time i've actually seen him mad.

so now i'm waiting for my ultrasound...alone. i really wanted him to be here, but he doesn't want anything to do with me. now i...


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really depressed right now.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 04 August 2013 · 51 views

i'm sliding into depression again. i have problems with self mutilation, and i'm practically sitting on my fucking hands so i don't go pick up a razor blade. i'm not hesitating for myself, because i have no interest in quitting. it's for the baby. i have to keep remembering that it's not just me anymore.

i have five razor blades...


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august pretty much blows.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 03 August 2013 · 46 views

i've been a mess lately. my boyfriend and i are constantly fighting because my moods are so erratic. with a handful of mood disorders, no medication, and a baby on the way, i can't say i'm surprised. i just didn't think it would be this crazy. he doesn't know about me coming off all my pills or the baby...and i'm off my pills bec...


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how stupid can you get!?

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 01 August 2013 · 38 views

this isn't about the guy that fucked up my life, he's still walking free. but i have an exboyfriend trying to contact me from prison. he's in prison for unlawful sexual conduct with a minor. that's not what he should have gotten charged with. he was 19 , and had sex with a 12 year old. it was consensual, but still! i put a year and a...


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my brother.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 31 July 2013 · 62 views

so my brother's in the military, and i had a dream he got hurt really bad. i was there and i wanted to save him, but he wouldn't let me. it didn't really make sense, but i woke up pretty rattled. i feel stupid 'cause i keep getting all teary-eyed, but he means the whole world to me. my dad died when i was two, so my brother has been the on...


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memories.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 30 July 2013 · 60 views

i believe i've been regressing. i've had so many ups and downs lately, but there's a lot going on. but i keep thinking about what happened. i remember that night when i got home, my mom was so mad at me. she said it was my fault because i didn't scream. she said she was right upstairs and would have done something if she knew. my mom has a...


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didn't quite anticipate this.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 29 July 2013 · 65 views

so it's been determined that i'm around seven weeks along. how was i unaware that something is living inside of me for seven weeks? i feel guilty and negligent for waiting so long to pursue this matter. and i'm really worried about all the things i've been putting in my system. i take fourteen pills a day and i was drinking with my boyfri...


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kinda stressed.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 28 July 2013 · 45 views

i think it's stupid that it's so much easier to tell strangers on the internet things that i'm scared to tell people in the real world. yesterday i found out that i'm expecting a little one. it wasn't a huge shock, because i had every telltale symptom in the book. regardless, nobody knows. i don't know how, or when, i should tell h...


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got fired.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 19 July 2013 · 51 views

lost my job last week. i supposedly "got laid off because we hit a slow period." uh...no. i feel like it was honestly a personal thing with the owner. she's treated me like shit since day one. she never spoke to me. had i not had a tight connection with the executive chef, i have no doubt that i wouldn't have gotten that job. she's su...


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can't sleep.

Posted by SomebodyLoveMe , 15 July 2013 · 47 views

anxiety is acting up. it's been over six months since i've stayed somewhere other than my own house. my boyfriend had to go home after our five day staycation, and my mom won't be back from vegas until way late tomorrow. i'm at my grandparents' house because i can't handle so much time alone. luckily, they're keeping my big, st...






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