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My progress report

Posted by bellachai , 24 March 2010 · 25 views

I have returned from therapy. I see my therapist at the community mental health department because I no longer have health insurance and cannot afford private counseling. I get therapy for free. I lucked out though to have a good therapist. She does not allow me to divert conversations I do not wish to delve in. Anyway I have been seeing her for a little over a year. Today part of therapy was on a progress report she is required to complete periodically after all it is Government funded. There is alot of bureaucratic BS in this progress report but has to be done. I have actually have made progress. My suicide rating has gone from an 8 to a 4. We have worked on my self worthlessness issues. We have worked on the depression and are just now working on the abuse issues.

I learned something today. People who are abused as children grow up usually to be involved with being abused again. This happens because survivors do not know anything different, or preditors and abusers recognize survivors, or it is what a survivor believes they deserve as they were taught that, or combination or all of these reasons.

In my case all the above are true for me. After my childhood rapes, molestations, and physical and mental abuse I have been date raped, married a man who was controlling and verbally and emotionally abusive. I have read in pandy's this is true of alot of us. I am truly sad and sorry this has happened to anyone. I am grateful I have found this community, it is like I finally belong somewhere.

Blessings to all of us. :tear:



It sounds like you are making progress. That is great.
I can relate to the series of abuse. It is almost as if we do not know any different and so we do not except anything different. I am sorry you have been through all that you have.
Jane
It seems we are all reporting progress today. :---) Ah, movement. love it. good for you !

It sounds like you are making progress. That is great.
I can relate to the series of abuse. It is almost as if we do not know any different and so we do not except anything different. I am sorry you have been through all that you have.
Jane


Thank you Jane for your reply. I agree with you and being here in this community perhaps we will all learn that we are not what we came from and we deserve so much better than what we are living. Blessings

It seems we are all reporting progress today. :---) Ah, movement. love it. good for you !



This is for you Zelda:

"Be forever taken from my sight
though nothing can bring back
the glory of the flower or the
splendor in the grass.
We will grieve not but rather
find strength in what remains behind."
William Wordsworth in part of Ode

Blessings
Progress is great! I know what you mean about the BS in those reports, believe me, I used to have to do them when I did agency work!

Anyways, I know what you mean about the pattern, I fell into it as well, I think I got lucky though somehow, and was able to end the pattern.

Progress is great! I know what you mean about the BS in those reports, believe me, I used to have to do them when I did agency work!

Anyways, I know what you mean about the pattern, I fell into it as well, I think I got lucky though somehow, and was able to end the pattern.


Yes, recognizing and changing patterns and habits are truly difficult. Thank you for your response. Blessings

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Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.