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Faith

Posted by bellachai , 18 March 2010 · 75 views

I think that I have a very odd take on faith and religion but it works for me. I cannot imagine an all powerful God that would allow the torture and abuse that happened to me or any child for that matter so I do not believe in a God like that. Yet on the hand I do not believe we just materialize out of nothing. That we just are is beyond my comprehension. I use to think this was purgatory; neither heaven and hell just a way station to one of those two places. Now I believe that there is a Higher Power and this power lives inside of me as a guide and all the other stuff is beyond my comprehension for now. So I do not follow any one kind of religion. I was baptized in the Catholic Church but raised on and off in the Church of Christ. None of these religions stopped my abuse or helped in any way. I have gone into many different denominations of religion and I found them fraudulent. My experience has been they preach what the board of directors tells them to preach and they all interpret the bible or scripture differently so the end up telling you what to believe and how to live. I do not like to be told how to live anymore. The Catholic church hides pediphiles.

I believe that this life is not the end for me. I believe I will have many lives until I am fully enlightened to the Higher Power and become one with that. I believe that I have angel guides. I name one angel Emma she is my comfort angel. I believe that my experiences were for a reason even though I think it is unfair and often ask why me??? My soul just needed to learn something and maybe it is just so I can help others who are struggling or stop the abuse all together. A great thought and not surprising for me the idealist.

I would like to feel the way the buddha's faces look, so content and serene. Like they know what enlightenment is really like and it is all so wonderful beyond comprehension and all this is just a way station for something different and better. This life is just a journey to be enlightened. I like to think of myself a spiritual rather than religious.

Blessings to all



Forgiveness is a big topic here and in my group. Where would forgiveness begin and end? It would necessary to forgive molecules and ether and everthing that makes up the universe. Anyway, I find spirtuality strenghtening as well, thanks for reminding me.

Forgiveness is a big topic here and in my group. Where would forgiveness begin and end? It would necessary to forgive molecules and ether and everthing that makes up the universe. Anyway, I find spirtuality strenghtening as well, thanks for reminding me.


Hi Zelda,

Forgiveness is an ongoing idea in my head. It is an ongoing theme for all survivors to blame themselves for the abuse they have and continue to survive so the only forgivenss IMO we need to practice is for blaming ourselves. The blame lies with the abusers and those who allowed it to happen and those who knew and did nothing to stop it. At this point I do not feel I need to forgive the unforgivable only myself for thinking there was something wrong with me that somehow I deserved to be abused or asked for it or just was an ughly person that caused people to abuse me. Myself need forgiveness for such warped thinking. Abuse is the ultimate betrayal and it damaged me and made my soul sick. My spirituality is what keeps me going some days and do not feel obligated to forgive my abusers. Blessings to you Zelda
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missophelia
Mar 19 2010 11:56 AM
I think faith can go a long way in giving someone the strength needed to get through some horrible things. I also think faith, and spirituality are different for each person, and no one belief is the only one that is right.

I like your thoughts and beliefs. Especially questioning a God that would allow a child to be tortured or abused. And no, I don't believe we just materialize out of nowhere.

I'm a lot like you. I don't follow any one faith. I also have problems with "organized" religion. In the end, I think that whatever you believe is fine, as long as you do no harm to another.

peace to you

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