Pandora's Aquarium: Comedy of Errors - Pandora's Aquarium

I had this flash of memory that haunts me. It is being held down and being tickled by the evil stepfather. Tickling is suppose to be funny but it is not. Being tickled until it is physically painful and does not stop is not funny. It is torture. Cannot move to escape. Words to stop unheard and unheaded. Tears of pain ignored. Like hitting your funny bone on your elbow. Nothing funny about it. It just hurts.

Physical pain causes emotional pain. Emotional pain causes physical pain. They feed off each other. A snowball effect. I woke this morning with crusty eyes which means I was crying in my sleep. Is it a blessing I do not remember the dream. Will the dream be a healing thing even if I do not remember it? Or maybe I just had allergies in my sleep. What is not funny today will it be funny someday. Will I be able to find humor in my ordeal of now someday or will is be a mental break of hysteria?

I remember someone telling me if you have a sense of humor you can survive anything. I am a fan of sarcasm even if I do not know how to spell it. I have lived my adult life trying to find the humor in all things or else lose my mind or become a bitter hatefilled person. Humor has been my escape. I speak softly. I tread softly. I listen intensely. But I laugh loudly. Since my breakdown I do not laugh as much and I miss my escape in humor but there seems to be less to laugh about or is it I am tired of looking for the humor? I do not know.

Yesterday I went to my mailbox and there was a package and it rattled as if it could be my medication for my fibro. All the way back to the house I am thinking oh thank God I will be able to fall asleep pain free tonight therefore tomorrow I will be better rested and get some things done. I will feel better. yahoo!!! Alas it was a free sample of a breakfast snack. (it at least was pretty good). I did however receive a letter from the pharmacutical company who would be sending me my Lyrica. My doctor faxed them the wrong script, one for medication they do produce. OMG. :angry:

I had refills with this pharmacutical company should have been a slam dunk getting them and I ordered them in time before I ran out here at home. The pharmacutical company mergered with another company so I was instructed to get another script and complete another application form. I did that and my doctor's office faxed it for me. Seven days later I get a letter stating the script is missing some information. Back I go to the Doctor's office. By this time I am out of Lyrica and I ask Doctor office for sample until my meds arrive but they are out. Now another seven days later they corrected the script but sent another script for estrogen. It is the weekend so I have to wait til Monday at least to call the Doctors office again to fix this problem. Is this funny or what? Why does it have to be so difficult. Of course if I was able to work or had any kind of income while I try to heal physically and mentally then I could purchase the meds through Walmart but if this could happen I probably would not need the medication in the first place so it would be a nonissue.

So onward we go. One step at a time and one day at a time.