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Celebration or not

Posted by bellachai , 13 March 2010 · 23 views

I am happy for me yet feel guilty that my happiness is a saddness for my daughter.

When I had my breakdown a year and half ago it was just me and my daughter. She was only 19 then. She had her own health issues which I am happy to say have been dealt with in a positive healing way. I was suicidal and rarely left my bed much less the house. She stood by me and helped me find the help I needed. While I was in this awful state and place she met and immediately moved in her boyfriend. I was in no shape to agree or disagree to this arrangement and at first I felt that it was good she had someone to be there for her in dealing with me. My parents sort of dropped me and rarely involved themselves in my situation. The majority of my friends also disappeared from my life. My daughters boyfriend came with his own disfunctions. He reminds me of Eddie Haskell from the old TV series 'Leave It To Beaver' only a more modern and sadder version.

Eddie Haskell left another state and his father's home to get away from the peer group he was associating with which were involved in drugs and alcohol. He is only a few months older than my daughter. My daughter is anti any of that so he had to become clean which I have to give him credit for he did clean up entirely. I have always taken the position of being willing to help anyone who wants to help themselves.

This last year and a half been difficult. More so with another dysfunctional human being in my home. My daughter is intellegent yet so blindly stupid. Eddie Haskell lies pathologically, very insecure and the laziest person I have ever come across (I probably am exaggerating a little LOL). In the beginning I was under the belief like my daughter that all he needed was love, understanding, patience in a safe, caring and drug free enviroment. My daughter still believes this but sadly I do not. He is a poser, a fake person.

If Eddie Haskell had all the material possessions he continually states he has in a storage unit where his father lives the unit would be as large as a major city high school and we would be living in so much luxury or it would have been sold and he and my daughter would have their own home and not living in poverty with me.

If Eddie Haskell really had all the work experience with high salaries as he states then he would have obtained at least one job in the year and half he has been here. If he had been to all the places he says he has then he would have found a high paying job somewhere in trhe world since as he states he has been almost everywhere. Truth is he does not even have a high school diploma and he has had opportunities here to study and obtain a GED which he did not take advantage of. He starts things and does not finish them. According to him he has been everywhere and done everything.

Eddie Haskell has successfully alienated my daughter from family and friends by his rudeness and attitudes. He is a bully therefore a coward. I told my daughter not too long ago that I found it creepy that he has made no friends and does not even desire to have any except her and would prefer that she have not have any either. Eddie Haskell is always pleasant to me and willing to run errands for me. A small price to pay for free room and board plus benefits (meaning my daughter).

I have watched the harm his lies have caused. I have watched my home become trashed due to his disregard and lies. I have watched how he has placed my daughter in debt by his lies. She has a job and she does all the things a responsible person usually does. Eddie Haskell avoids responsibility especially for himself. It is so sad as it is my belief he is a lost boy.

Anyway Eddie Haskell left yesterday. He says he has a job in the town his father lives in so that is where he went. He says he will get set up then my daughter can follow him there. I am delighted that he is not here yet my daughter is sad he is not here.

I do not set appropriate boundries and I am not healed enough to even know how to set them yet.



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missophelia
Mar 13 2010 01:03 PM
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: What a wonderful new friend you are missophelia. I am giving you the same. Abundant blessings to you.
It sounds like a celebration for all. Hopefully your daughter will come to realize it on her own, and it sounds like might come around, especially with a mother like you. I have to admit I was rather amused by your Eddie Haskell comparison.

Thank you Zelda. You are as sweet as my beloved ferret. I so hope you are right and she will see and set appropriate boundries for herself. She is pretty down now missing Eddie Haskell. I hope it is okay to send you hugs. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: Blessings to you.

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