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Investments

Posted by bellachai , 18 June 2013 · 65 views

I woke up this morning thinking about how much I invested 'me' in those who I love/loved and care about. I realized that over the years I overextended myself to the point of becoming bankrupted financially, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Now there is no 'me' anymore. Just a heartbroken empty shell physically exhausted, broken and...


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Peeved and freaked out

Posted by bellachai , 10 June 2013 · 41 views

I have so much going on in my head that I need to regurgitate all of it but not all at once.

I remember in therapy; baby steps.

I feel anger, confusion, worry, suspicious, resentment, irratated and disturbed lately. Anxiety level is high. My sleep patterns are so messed up like I never went to bed last night. My daughter tells me that I am also paran...


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Inner conversations

Posted by bellachai , 07 June 2013 · 59 views

When I received the letter stating I was approved for disability I cried in relief. Since then I have a lot of inner conversations going on.

Reading the letter again and again noticing the word 'severe' hit me in the face with the reality yes I am ill and I will not get any better. The only thing I can do is manage all my illnesses as best I can...





June 2013

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