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artemis618 likes this

Does It Ever End?

18 September 2012
Posted by artemis618  
8 years. I've been a victim since I was 13 years old. And it hasn't stopped. Different guys, different situations, different ways to cope or not cope. It's getting to a point where I want to leave my boyfriend because he knows what's happened to me. I want to be with someone who doesn't see my hurt. Doesn't see my...
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I thought it would help..

06 November 2011
Posted by artemis618  
So I decided to listen to everyone and "take responsibility for my actions and the unfortunate consequences they have had". This meant that I would blame myself for all the times I've been attacked.

I thought it would help if I said that it just made a mistake instead of admitting that I've been assaulted and raped..

My ex...
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Park Bench

28 October 2011
Posted by artemis618  
Today, I decided to sit at the bench under a tree after my class. Even though the day was cold, I just wanted to stop and look at the leaves in their beautiful shades of gold and crimson. Even though it's almost the three year anniversary of my attack, I found myself smiling at the beautiful cool autumn day.

Then he sat down next to me. I...
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It Hurts Too Much

24 August 2011
Posted by artemis618  
My most recent abuser was my ex boyfriend. But I fell in love with him and I'm still in love with him. We weren't doing so well and broke up about 7 months ago. My feelings haven't changed and I still love him and want to be with him more than anything. He wanted to continue to stay friends but I said I couldn't do that while I...
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A Letter To My Ex

12 May 2011
Posted by artemis618  
To: A Sorry Excuse for a Human Being

You are a weak, pathetic hypocrite! I hate you! You always want to play the victim but God forbid that you have to look in the mirror and confess to what you’ve done to make this relationship fail. I am not the only person capable of making mistakes but someday you’ll finally realize that I’m...
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Posted by artemis618  
Yesterday, my friends decided to pull a prank on me. I was in the shower at the my dorm and they moved my towel. This wasn't where I got upset. They decided to film in on one of their laptops . I slipped in the shower and the curtain moved back and they got footage of me naked on their video. Finally when I got out of the shower and...
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It's Been A Long Time

10 March 2011
Posted by artemis618  
[font="Arial"][size="3"]It's been a long time since I logged on to Pandys. It's been a long time since I wrote a blog. It's been a long time since I've been alright. I've been seeing a T at the school I go to. I thought it was helping but I feel like I'm getting worse. ...
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Posted by artemis618  
I thought I loved him. And I think a part of me did. I trusted him with the truth about my past and all the times that I was hurt and abused and used. He said he loved me but he didn't! He just became another name to my list of men who have hurt me. I stood up for him, I was there was no one else was. I kept his secrets and his past...
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Posted by artemis618  
I'm at the point where when I look back on everything that has happened to me, I want to crawl away and just lay there until the Earth stops spinning. I feel useless where somedays I can't even get out of bed to shower or eat. I'm tired of being the victim. Is there a point where you just reach a point of anger and hate then heal? ...
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It's Time To Tell The Truth

17 December 2009
Posted by artemis618  
Last night I told my friend J everything that has happened to me. I've never told anyone else about all the bad things that happened to me. It actually felt really good to talk about all the times I've been hurt, used, or abused. I haven't told my parents about all the other times I've been attacked other than the most recent,...
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