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Posted by missophelia , 06 August 2010 · 68 views

Today was not wonderful. I slept ok, so that hasnít been the problem. My problem is where my thinking has taken me. Sometimes I wish I could just not think at all.

On a bright note, I picked up a cleaning job for tomorrow. Itís the same lady I cleaned for 3 weeks ago. She wants me to come back again. This is ok. I think that if I was cleaning more...



Posted by missophelia , 05 August 2010 · 74 views

Today was better than yesterday. Which is always a good thing. I slept ok, not wonderfully. But I havenít been as tired today.

Not much happened today. It was kind of a down day, like down as in nothing happening, not as in being depressed or something. Which actually felt ok, to have a day like today.

I just finished cleaning my horribly filthy ki...


let it all out

Posted by missophelia , 04 August 2010 · 82 views

Today wasnít wonderful. It was just ok. Maybe if I just let it all out, about how I feel, then Iíll feel a little better.

I didnít sleep well. And whenever that happens, it seems to affect my day. I didnít have nightmares. I just had that dream, where I feel like Iím being smothered. I woke up for a little while, then fell back to sleep, and had th...


feeling pissy

Posted by missophelia , 03 August 2010 · 67 views

Today has been alright. Not wonderful.

I didnít sleep too well. Just restless, more than anything. No dreams, which is always a good thing. I was just up and down several times. But I was tired, so I was never up for very long at one time. So, Iíve been kind of tired all day.

My stomach is still off. And it feels like my ulcer pain is back. I do...



Posted by missophelia , 02 August 2010 · 73 views

Today has been good. Long, but good. I took a little nap, kind of by accident. I guess being up early made me more tired than I thought. So, no surprise when I lay down on the couch to watch some TV--I guess I needed it!!

Shopping went ok. I was a little on edge. Itís so weird that, being in the same area as Ken, for the past 10 years, that...


what has remained

Posted by missophelia , 01 August 2010 · 43 views

Today has been better than yesterday. Definitely. Iím not feeling quite as badly as I was. I guess if things get a little better with each day, thatís a good thing. Itís just that I feel like I donít bounce back very well from having a bad day. Itís kind of scary.

And I have to admit, the things Ken said to me are still bothering me. Not like they...


self blame

Posted by missophelia , 31 July 2010 · 86 views

Well, I made it through last night. Being here, and everyone here, really helped me. I finally passed out, I was so exhausted. And no nightmare. I was so relieved.

Today has been ok. But Iíve been being really hard on myself, and Iíve been trying to change what Iím thinking. But itís not going too well.

Iím also trying to make sense of how I think...



Posted by missophelia , 30 July 2010 · 59 views

Today wasnít good. And right now I feel broken. And vulnerable. And scared. And tired. And really anxious and sick to my stomach.

I had a pretty bad experience in Walmart today, and I took one of my sleeping pills when I got home. I didnít sleep for long, but Iím still tired. I know I shouldnít have taken it. My whole sleep pattern might be all s...



Posted by missophelia , 29 July 2010 · 61 views

Today has been alright, but frustrating. I guess thatís how I would sum up my whole day, pretty much. Frustrating.

I had a bad dream last night. It wasnít a nightmare like I usually get. I was thankful for that. But all the same, Iíd rather not have any bad dreams.

It was just him, staring at me. I donít know how long that went on in my dream. Bu...


hot wings and strawberries

Posted by missophelia , 28 July 2010 · 69 views

Today went well, better than I thought it would. I actually made it through court, in one piece.

I didnít do much before I went, just kind of relaxed this morning. And as I left, and on my way there, I thought about everyone here, and what everyone has said to me. And it helped so much. And Iím so thankful that all of you are here.

I really apprecia...

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This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    3 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 3 guests, 0 anonymous users

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