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Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

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bellachai, jmsclayton, Lucchia and 2 others like this

My Uncle

18 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
My uncle was a big part of my life. We spent lots of summer days at his house swimming in his pool. Growing up I considered my uncle more of a buddy. He was always very friendly. He always asked how I was. He was affectionate with his hugs. He was safe.

He was also a drunk. Every time I saw him he had a beer or other alcoholic drink in his...
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10-17 Years Old

17 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
This period of my life was hard for me. I first started going through depression before I turned 11. What was most constant during this period of my life was me lying in bed at night, listening to the radio, and crying.

For a brief period of time after my mother molested me, I thought about going to my father and telling him. I imagined my dad...
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Posted by missophelia  
My session with Dr H was good today. It seems that my sessions are becoming more productive and helpful for me.

I used to hate them.

I told Dr H about my dream, the one where I was going to tell my mom that I'd been raped. We talked about the dream for a little while. And we talked about how calm I felt when I woke up, as opposed to the...
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My Mother

15 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
This is going to be hard for me, but I'm determined to do this.

When I was 10 years old, my mother molested me. It took me a long time to come to terms with it, but I've never told anyone about it.

It was summer time. My father was at work. My little brother J was out playing somewhere in the neighborhood. I was doing some drawing in...
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I Have Decided

14 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
I've been doing some more thinking today, but not like I did the other day. That day I ended up with horrible anxiety.

I've made a decision.

I'm going to tell my story. I'll tell it here. And I will work up the courage to tell it face to face to Dr H.

I realized something today.

If I tell my story, I think it will give me...
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Better?

13 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
Today's been a little better. I've been feeling a little less out of sorts, a little more comfortable with myself.

Didn't do much but sleep most of the day. It would help if I got some sleep at night, like "normal" people do. But it's been a long time since that's happened.

I'd love to move on from my...
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out of sorts

12 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
Today has been just great. I'm in a funk, and I hate when I get this way.

I'm out of sorts. Very uncomfortable with myself right now. Very uncomfortable with everything around me. I've been like this all day.

I hate my life. I'm so unsatisfied. Nothing in my life is what I want it to be. I feel like my life has no meaning,...
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Thinking Too Much

11 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
I think I've been thinking too much.

I didn't sleep well last night. My stomach hurt badly, and I was restless. Couldn't seem to calm myself down. Part of me didn't want to dream, so I fought sleep. Eventually I fell asleep, but I was up pretty early this morning. Luckily I'm used to operating on little sleep, but I know...
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A Dream

10 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
I dreamed last night.

Dr H asked me what my nightmares are like. How they make me feel. I told her that they're scary. That I always wake up scared to death. Because my nightmares seem so real.

Last night's dream started out like my usual nightmares do. A slow replay of him raping me. Just like every time, the beginning of it...
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Him

09 February 2010
Posted by missophelia  
Dr H and I talked a little about him yesterday.

He was a Chief Petty Officer when I met him the first time. An E-7 in rank. When I was in my Navy "A" school.

I was a Seaman at the time, an E-3 in rank. I was just out of boot camp, with a short leave time before my school started. I was new to the Navy, and excited to be in the...
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bellachai, jmsclayton, Lucchia and 2 others like this

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