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Posted by missophelia , 08 August 2013 · 70 views

There is so much that I find to be triggering to me wanting to SI.

I haven't had to deal with urges like this in such a long time.

Part of my therapy homework this week is to put my tool somewhere where it isn't readily accessible in the middle of the night.

I don't know if I can do that, because I'm having some pretty big urges to SI right now.

On top of the pain I've been having, my car broke down on the highway today.

So, I have that to worry about. It's either the engine, or maybe the fuel pump. I don't know.

On top of that, I've been feeling triggered to stuff surrounding the rapes.

Which is triggering some horrible feelings about myself.

I want the urges to SI to go away.

And I know how to make them.



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This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

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    Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.