from homework for this week...
And the way that I know that hope has helped me cope in the past? Currently, I feel no hope. Everything feels hopeless to me.
I am doing homework writing on things that have helped me cope in the past. Dr K is trying to help me deal with my SI'ing in hopes of getting me to get straight and stop doing harm to myself. And one way is to use coping skills that are more positive, instead of using SI'ing to cope.
What scares me most about what I've shared here in my writing, is the total lack of hope that I have. When my depression overtakes me, when the waves of it hit, I feel a total loss of hope.