Pandora's Aquarium: veterans day.... - Pandora's Aquarium

Jump to content

Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

Welcome to Pandora's Aquarium, a rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivor message board and chat room.
If you've been a victim of any type of sexual violence, you belong here. What you see below represents just a fraction of the resources and survivor support available. Register now to join our community and take full advantage of what this online support group has to offer you as you heal and recover, or sign in to remove this message.

You are not alone, we can support you as you heal, and you've made an important step toward recovery by reaching out. If you are unable to register or have any questions, please contact the staff or view our home page.

Guest Message © 2013 DevFuse

veterans day....

11 November 2012
Posted by missophelia 
I am your veteran.

I served your country
My country
The United States of America

I am your veteran

But I did not see combat
At least
Not with a gun
Not with a bayonet
Not with a rocket launcher, not with a grenade
I did not fight hand to hand in some foreign land

My scars are real
Yet
Unseen

I am your veteran

My battles were fought
My battles are fought
Inside of this body and mind and soul
That rages
Inside of this person you call
A veteran

I am your veteran

I served my country
I protected my country
Against all enemies
Foreign and domestic
But who was there to protect me
From the enemy who turned out to be

Another of your veterans

I am your veteran

Do not thank me
Do not parade in honor of me
Do not set me above
The every day citizen of your country
Because there is nothing left inside of me
That bears any honor

I am your veteran

I was discharged honorably
But the honor I was to hold
In feeling pride
In serving my country
Was taken from me
Against my will

By another of your veterans

I am your veteran

I am your veteran
I am your Yankee Doodle Dandy
I AM a real life niece of your Uncle Sam
I WAS born on the Fourth of July
I have come marching
Home again

I am your veteran

I have anger, rage, hatred
I have depression, anxiety, fear
I have hidden wounds, and wounds not so hidden
I have nightmares, flashbacks
I have no trust, no pride
I have no faith

I am your veteran

I am a survivor of MST
I faced that domestic enemy
And lost that battle
And now every day
I face an inner battle
And fight myself

And fight to keep from losing

I am your veteran

What was taken from me
Can never be replaced
Can never be gotten back
Can never be made right
What was taken from me
Can never be brought to justice

I am your veteran

The road I have marched down
Has been long
Frightening
Tiring
Dark
But it goes on

I am your veteran

And just as I was trained
Just as I learned
I must keep down that road
I must keep fighting
Against every fiber inside of me
That screams

To lay down
To give in
To give up

I am your veteran

If you must remember me this day
If you must honor me this day
Remember me not for my glory
Honor me not for wearing my uniform
But instead remember and honor me
For being able to say

In the face of all I have been through
In the face of all that I feel
That, still,

I am your veteran

missophelia likes this
Back to my blog →

4 Comments On This Entry

I think this is beautifully written. It probably was difficult to write but you really captured all the emotion behind it all.
Thank you for sharing this.
Untangling-It-All, 12 November 2012 - 08:22 AM
Untangling

Thank you. And yes, it was extremely difficult to write. The emotions are there, but I still feel like they are just under the surface, and haven't really come out yet. There is so much for me surrounding veteran's day, and this year was particularly difficult and painful for me.

Thank you for reading, and for listening.
missophelia, 12 November 2012 - 07:34 PM
I apologize for being late to this my dear friend. You've moved me to tears with the deep pain that lies within these words. I'm sorry this year was particularly hard/painful for you. I hope you are well. I also thank you for sharing!

Much Love! :hug:/> :hug:/> :hug:/>
Susan, 14 November 2012 - 04:53 AM
Susan

Thank you. I'm glad I was able to get those words out. I don't know if it's helped me much, hopefully if I can keep expressing, next year won't be so hard and painful for me. I'm glad I moved you so much. I am better now that the weekend has passed.

And I thank you, too, for reading, and for listening.

Lots of love! :hug: :hug: :hug:
missophelia, 14 November 2012 - 05:32 AM
Page 1 of 1

Blog Warning

This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

← May 2013 →

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19 20 2122232425
262728293031 

Recent Entries

My Blog Links

Mark Blog as read
Archive

Recent Comments

Tags

    0 user(s) viewing

    0 Guests
    0 member(s)
    0 anonymous member(s)

    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    0 user(s) viewing

    0 Guests
    0 member(s)
    0 anonymous member(s)


    Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.