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My tumblr blog post for the evening, if anyone cares to read.
http://artlifehealing.tumblr.com/
Today hasn't been a good day for me.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning. Went to check stuff online, found a major problem with my good laptop. Right now I'm using my old one. I hope it holds up until I decide what to do about my good one, because that one is unusable.
Anyway, by the time I realized that I couldn't do anything about it, I didn't have enough time to go back to sleep before I needed to be up.
pay
I'm trying to work on my homework for therapy. I don't see Dr K until Friday this week. It has become very hard for me to do the work.
And then, as I was getting ready to leave the VA today, I stopped at travel to get my travel reimbursement. As I was picking up my pay sheet, the guy who works there made a really snide comment about how much I "love" coming down to the VA.
It bothered me all the way home.
It's left me feeling defective. Which I already feel.
I don't LOVE going down to the VA all the time. It really sucks that I have to go down there for therapy. And that I can't seem to have a life or function without music therapy or going to the art room. Because there are many days that I feel like I can't function.
And right now, that's how I'm feeling about myself.
What a freaking tool that guy is!
I just feel depressed, and anxious.
And defective.
I'm nothing but a great big dumbass who got in trouble, got what I deserved, and look where I am now. I can't work full time, the only person in my life besides my daughter, is my sponsor. I have no social life, most times don't want one because I feel so freaking defective. So I am stuck going down to the VA to be "social" in the art room. And to have music therapy. Because I'm so lame I can't go be freaking social around here.
So, yeah, I just LOVE going down to the art room. Yeah, when, if I had my say in the matter, I would just stay locked in my house, and give in and not force myself to go to work, or to go to the art room or to music therapy, or even to regular therapy.
http://artlifehealing.tumblr.com/
Today hasn't been a good day for me.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning. Went to check stuff online, found a major problem with my good laptop. Right now I'm using my old one. I hope it holds up until I decide what to do about my good one, because that one is unusable.
Anyway, by the time I realized that I couldn't do anything about it, I didn't have enough time to go back to sleep before I needed to be up.
pay
I'm trying to work on my homework for therapy. I don't see Dr K until Friday this week. It has become very hard for me to do the work.
And then, as I was getting ready to leave the VA today, I stopped at travel to get my travel reimbursement. As I was picking up my pay sheet, the guy who works there made a really snide comment about how much I "love" coming down to the VA.
It bothered me all the way home.
It's left me feeling defective. Which I already feel.
I don't LOVE going down to the VA all the time. It really sucks that I have to go down there for therapy. And that I can't seem to have a life or function without music therapy or going to the art room. Because there are many days that I feel like I can't function.
And right now, that's how I'm feeling about myself.
What a freaking tool that guy is!
I just feel depressed, and anxious.
And defective.
I'm nothing but a great big dumbass who got in trouble, got what I deserved, and look where I am now. I can't work full time, the only person in my life besides my daughter, is my sponsor. I have no social life, most times don't want one because I feel so freaking defective. So I am stuck going down to the VA to be "social" in the art room. And to have music therapy. Because I'm so lame I can't go be freaking social around here.
So, yeah, I just LOVE going down to the art room. Yeah, when, if I had my say in the matter, I would just stay locked in my house, and give in and not force myself to go to work, or to go to the art room or to music therapy, or even to regular therapy.
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This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.
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Blog Warning
This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.
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