Update-I Feel Wonderful
It was nice to see everyone I know from when I used to work at M's business. The dinner was delicious, and H, an older man who cares for M's mother, told a few really funny jokes. There was lots of laughter and a good time.
My biggest fear once I got there, was actually driving a go cart. A was nervous too, and I really wanted her to enjoy it. I even told her that if she didn't try it, she would regret it later. Then I applied those words to myself. I reached past my fear, and actually joined in on one of the races.
I came in last place, but it was fun. And it was no where near as scary as my mind imagined it would be. A loved it so much that she went out for two other races. I am so glad I fought the anxiety and fear and raced, because it got A to go, and I feel like I would have let her down if I didn't race. And I think I would have let myself down as well.
Being out in the dark, on the way home, was ok too. A was right next to me, the parking lot was well lit, and it was in a secluded area, at the top of a hill with no other buildings or trees around. So the only people around were everyone in the party, and the employees of the place.
I feel wonderful right now. Dr H has told me that if I can face my fears, it will become easier over time, and it will go a long way in my healing. I really need to listen to her words, and trust that what she says helpful for me. Because it is.
And everyone here, who have been so encouraging, and there for me. Your words are also so helpful, and I greatly appreciate them. So, thank you.