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Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

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bellachai, jmsclayton, Lucchia and 2 others like this

why...

30 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
Why is it that I can tell someone I love very much that she is beautiful, smart, strong, worthy, and that she deserves the best.

And that I can't tell myself that with any kind of belief and conviction in my heart that I too am those things, and that I too deserve the best.

Why can't I say those things to myself, and really feel those...
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Posted by missophelia  
“That’s the thing about depression: A human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight. But depression is so insidious, and it compounds daily, that it’s impossible to ever see the end.”


— Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation



kind of where I am right now

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very...

25 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
very tired of everything, of all of the struggle I have gone through, and am going through. very tired of trying so hard, only to feel like I’m going absolutely nowhere.

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don't know....

23 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
I don't know how I got to the point where I find myself now. How I've fallen so far. This far. I feel like I am just so deep in the pit of my depression. That my anger consumes me every day. That my anxiety is made worse whenever I even try to think.

I don't honestly know how I can pull myself up out of this pit. I don't...
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Posted by missophelia  
Trying to make some sense of where I am at. Tonight, right now, I am extremely depressed. Even trying to get up and do something around the house has made my depression seem worse. But trying to sort through my depression, and all of the other emotions that are running rampant throughout me right now, it just seems so hard. I used to be able...
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Posted by missophelia  
Feeling hope has helped me cope in the past. Even though things could be horrible, having that feeling that they can change, that they can get better. That hope has gotten me through some bad times.

And the way that I know that hope has helped me cope in the past? Currently, I feel no hope. Everything feels hopeless to me.



I am doing...
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lack of...

16 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
The lack of control I feel in my life right now is a little overwhelming. My emotions, my finances, my relationships. It's a little scary. I feel pressure and stress, and my emotions just seem to runaway from me.

I get down on myself, and feel like a failure. Because I am not managing anything in my life well. And that doesn't even...
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react...

14 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
Trigger warning. Something I've written. Please take gentle care if you read on. The trigger warning is for talk of suicide, but it isn't really talk of suicide. More talk of the feelings and thoughts surrounding suicide.

My weekend hasn't been wonderful. And it comes on the heels of me being sick with a horrible stomach flu. I...
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pain...

11 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
I don't know if I can even describe the pain I am feeling tonight. It's just there, heavy inside of me.

I am having a lot of anxiety, and I'm depressed.

And I want to SI.

My depression has me scared, because when it is really bad I don't want to be on the planet. That is one of the things I told Dr K. I guess it's good...
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intensity...

10 April 2013
Posted by missophelia  
My session today was hard. Intense.

But in a way, good.

I unloaded on Dr K. She asked me how I was doing, and I said what I always do—not wonderful. And then, I just started talking. By the time I was done, it felt good.

But by the time I left her office, I felt horrible again.

And on the way home, it just all hit me again. All of the...
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bellachai, jmsclayton, Lucchia and 2 others like this

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This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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