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this is all so hard

Posted by missophelia , 16 August 2010 · 69 views

Today was alright.

I had therapy today. That went well. We talked about him. We talked about my flashbacks, and nightmares, and all of my feelings and reactions to those things. And we talked about my art piece, and what itís about.

I also told Dr H about my mother, and her not calling us on our anniversary. I told Dr H my mother should get over he...


my day, my thoughts, and another anniversary

Posted by missophelia , 15 August 2010 · 74 views

Today seems to have been a long day.

I got a lot done today, and Iím actually surprised that I did, because I didnít sleep well last night. I had a nightmare. Of the night behind the building. Mostly what I felt in my nightmare was fear, and his breath on me, his words and how they made me feel, and him inside of me. When I woke up, I could still f...


ramblings, staring eyes, and sadness

Posted by missophelia , 14 August 2010 · 84 views

Today was so-so. Not really good, not really bad. Which is ok. Sometimes neutral is nice.

I think itís really funny that my mother hasnít called me. My aunt and uncle from Ohio were here for a few days. They stopped by last night, later than they said theyíd be. But it was ok, I wasnít in bed, or even close to it.

Anyway, they wanted to hear abou...


I will not settle

Posted by missophelia , 13 August 2010 · 67 views

Today wasnít too bad, considering the last couple of days and nights.

Except that my semi sort of new printer died on me, right in the middle of trying to print something for my new art piece. So, I pulled out the other printer--now I just need ink!!

Iím kind of excited, because what Iím going to do is like nothing Iíve ever done before, as far...


no luck today

Posted by missophelia , 12 August 2010 · 76 views

Today was a rotten day.

I didnít sleep wonderfully, but I didnít have an awful nightmare. Still, I was a little restless, and even scared to try and go to sleep in the first place. But, I got through the night.

So, I decided to go down to the shrine. It was beautiful out, warm, but with a breeze. At one point I thought it was going to rain, but ther...


all of this

Posted by missophelia , 11 August 2010 · 67 views

Today has been rough. And if I hadnít had to go out, I would have probably hidden on the couch all day.

I had a nightmare last night. A bad one. And that was after having a pretty good evening last night. A didnít have to be to work until 12:30 this afternoon. So, after some friends of hers left, we stayed up and watched some TV together. It was al...


ok, and a smile

Posted by missophelia , 10 August 2010 · 70 views

Today was ok. It felt good, still feels good, to have shared some pics on my blog last night. To me it means that I have a build up of trust here. I really value everyone here, and being able to trust to put my pics up is a nice thing.

I was triggered some today. I saw the dentist, got my first impressions done for my dentures. I donít know why he d...


lets see if this goes

Posted by missophelia , 09 August 2010 · 99 views

lets see what happens.......

I didn't know what would happen, but something here did.

And my day was ok, so I guess there's tomorrow to blog about my session.

I think for tonight, posting just this feels good. :)


an unspoken bond

Posted by missophelia , 08 August 2010 · 66 views

Todayís been ok, for the most part. I have been napping. I guess yesterday tired me out more than I thought. And I guess I better get to bed early. I have to leave for therapy at 6:45 in the morning!

A got in touch with my mother, in regards to her trust. She wants some of the money to pay her first monthís bills, until she starts getting a stea...


a good walk down memory lane

Posted by missophelia , 07 August 2010 · 71 views

Today turned out to be better than the way it started out.

I didnít sleep well. I know there was lots on my mind, mainly what I blogged about last night. The whole anniversary thing. But after I got up this morning, and got moving, I tried to put it out of my mind. Thereís plenty of time to think about it, like on Monday. You know, with Dr H.

Iím t...

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This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    1 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

    Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.