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nothing to get excited about...at least that's how I feel

Posted by missophelia , 19 September 2010 · 12 views

Today has been a day that I havenít been very excited about anything. Itís not that Iím having a bad day. And I am getting things accomplished. But I just sort of feel like thereís not much I care about.

I know Iím looking forward to therapy tomorrow, but right now Iím not feeling it. I donít know whatís going on with me. Maybe itís that Iím just n...


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conflicted

Posted by missophelia , 18 September 2010 · 37 views

I am conflicted, to say the least. Itís been one of those days, when I wish I could divorce every one in my family except for A. Just have them all be gone!!

I had another one of those smothering dreams last night. But maybe theyíre more like nightmares. That dream always brings back the memory that I really thought I was going to die that ni...


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rambling and realization

Posted by missophelia , 17 September 2010 · 46 views

So, Iím slowly getting back to normal, as far as my laptop goes. I spent a lot of time with the techie guy last night getting the hard drive installed, and then the operating system and drivers. Like, almost 3 hours.

And today, I got some of the stuff installed, like my Microsoft Works. But I still have pictures to transfer back on, the stuff for my...


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let's not go there again

Posted by missophelia , 16 September 2010 · 27 views

Today has been good, and not so good. Iíve kind of been up and down, both with my emotions, and with how Iím feeling physically.

I didnít sleep well last night. I know that part of it was my stomach. But I had that smothering dream, and then for the rest of the night I was restless. I got up for a little while, but at least I was able to get back int...


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resting and thinking

Posted by missophelia , 15 September 2010 · 20 views

Itís been a long day, and Iím tired. Iíve been napping, but it doesnít seem to be helping my tiredness. I had my GI test this morning. I prepped, nothing to eat or drink after 10pm last night. Which was hard.

My stomach has been bothering me, and what I really needed, all through the night, was some antacid. But I couldnít have it. I stuck to what...


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release

Posted by missophelia , 14 September 2010 · 32 views

Today has been a day of exhaustion, both emotional and physical. Although, right now, Iím not as exhausted as I was yesterday. Slowly, Iím getting my energy back.

Yesterday was big for me. Huge. That session was the hardest one I have ever had. And at one point, I thought about chickening out.

We started pretty much like we always do. I have had...


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exhausted...and then some

Posted by missophelia , 13 September 2010 · 29 views

Right now Iím absolutely exhausted. And relieved. And proud of myself. And sad, too. I feel like Iíve been through a war.

My session was this morning. My session went so well. Dr H was so good to me, so gentle and supportive.

I told her about that night, behind the building.

Thatís all I can write about it now. I will write more about it tomorro...


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yes, some thinking about tomorrow

Posted by missophelia , 12 September 2010 · 28 views

Today has been long, busy. Pretty good. Keeping busy has been good for me today.

I was up early, did the laundry. Did some house cleaning. Had to clean the kitchen, because D never cleans up his mess. Then this afternoon I made my stroganoff.

It felt really good to cook. I havenít in so long, and even this morning I was doubting whether Iíd have t...


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this anxiety has got to go...and, the theater

Posted by missophelia , 11 September 2010 · 30 views

Itís been a day to test me, thatís for sure.

I cleaned for my old lady today. The cleaning part went well. She was very happy with my work. She wasnít feeling well, though. I felt bad for her. She admitted to eating some junk last night, that didnít agree with her. I feel for her, because Iíve done the exact same thing she did, and I know how yucky...


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escape from car hell...and yes, other important stuff

Posted by missophelia , 10 September 2010 · 30 views

Oh what a day. I was in and out all day, most recently this evening. Now Iím just kind of exhausted.

I did some running around this morning. Mailing some bills out, some shopping, getting gas. Just normal stuff. Nothing too overwhelming. And on my way back home, my brakes did something funny, strange. Something that didnít sound or feel too good....






Blog Warning

This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    1 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users


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    Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.