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at least I tried

Posted by missophelia , 03 June 2010 · 76 views

I ran to Target this afternoon, to pick up some ink cartridges for my printer. I want to print a couple of my blogs out, and possibly take one of them to Dr H. I also picked up a couple of other things, and found a nice hoodie, which I needed.

It wasnít too busy in the store, but there was still a little bit of a line. As I was standing in line, this...


trying to take care of myself

Posted by missophelia , 02 June 2010 · 31 views

I didnít do much today. In fact, I just woke up a little while ago from a nap. Iím not feeling well.

Dealing with the pain Iím having is tiring. I think itís also adding stress to everything, and that is tiring, too. On a positive note, I started a log of everything I eat, when I eat it, and any pain or other distress I have and when I have it.



one of those days

Posted by missophelia , 01 June 2010 · 72 views

Today was one of those days, when I just wanted to throw my hands up in the air and scream ďI give up!Ē

I had my appointment with the surgeon this morning. We discussed my history with pain, with my ulcers, with the bacteria in my stomach, and with my IBS. After much discussion, he decided that heís not going to operate for now. I have another app...


my grandfather

Posted by missophelia , 31 May 2010 · 52 views

I spent a lot of time yesterday and last night thinking about my dad. The conclusion I kept coming to was that he doesnít deserve my pity, and that he was never the kind of father I could turn to for love and support.

He still isnít.

Then I got thinking about my grandfather, my fatherís dad. Partly because I was thinking about my own father. But also...


my father and his fist

Posted by missophelia , 30 May 2010 · 44 views

A and I went to an early dinner at my grandmotherís house today. I rarely go, but since my grandmother is 98, I figure I should start seeing her more often. There werenít many of us. Just myself, A, her friend, my aunt, my uncle, my father, and my grandmother, of course. I didnít eat much, because of the ongoing problems Iím having with pain.

I wasní...


why do my emotions leave me all mixed up?

Posted by missophelia , 29 May 2010 · 63 views

Today was ok. Not spectacular, but not as bad as my days have been lately. I didnít do much, just some housework. And some more cleaning out. I think Iím almost done doing that. It will feel good to have accomplished cleaning the junk out of my life.

I did do some writing today. Writing some more to my rescripting. Dr H said I could change it, or...


a little relief

Posted by missophelia , 28 May 2010 · 45 views

Today was a little better for me. I felt a little lighter today. I slept ok last night, and I think that helped. The house was cooler, and I was tired. All of that helped.

As I drank my coffee this morning, I picked up the bottle that the antibiotic came in, and I read the side. I noticed something different than the directions my doctor gave me. M...


overwhelmed and everything

Posted by missophelia , 27 May 2010 · 58 views

Itís been a kind of bad week for me. Iím filled with all of these bad emotions, and Iíd rather not feel anything at all. But thereís nothing I can do about how I feel.

Right now Iím overwhelmed by how Iím feeling physically. The medication Iím taking for my stomach is kicking my butt. I go from nausea, to feeling starving hungry, to feeling all bloat...



Posted by missophelia , 26 May 2010 · 51 views

Iíve been kind of down all day. I had another dream, and it didnít help me with how I felt when I went to bed. All of the doubt still seems to be with me.

I donít know if itís got something to do with the rescripting Iíve been doing. All I know is that Iím feeling all sorts of emotions, and maybe Iím a little discouraged. Maybe Iím being too hard on...



Posted by missophelia , 25 May 2010 · 31 views

For some reason, I was filled with doubts today. I donít know if it has to do with what Dr H and I talked about yesterday. Or maybe it has to do with the dream I had. But my thoughts have been restless all day.

I had a nightmare last night. It was a lot like what most of my dreams are like. It started with him grabbing me from behind, then pulling m...

Blog Warning

This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

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    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    14 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 13 guests, 0 anonymous users

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