Pieces Of Me

Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

There is still plenty of time and spaces if you'd like to sign up for the Guest Speaker Chat scheduled for this Saturday!

Welcome to Pandora's Aquarium, a rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivor message board and chat room.
If you've been a victim of any type of sexual violence, you belong here. What you see below represents just a fraction of the resources and survivor support available. Register now to join our community and take full advantage of what this online support group has to offer you as you heal and recover, or sign in to remove this message.

You are not alone, we can support you as you heal, and you've made an important step toward recovery by reaching out. If you are unable to register or have any questions, please contact the staff or view our home page.

Ingz, bellachai and bj_bear like this

It's been a long time

22 May 2011

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

I stopped therapy, it has been months now. It has been a long time since I came here to Pandys too. I have been trying to avoid things that remind me of the past. I don't think of it too often now, still I am affected by it everyday and I don't think that it will ever change. I am affected by it without even realizing it unless I focus on...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 2 Comments

What the hell is the point!?

19 November 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

You know I am wondering what the hell the point is. I am who I am, I am who they made me, and I hate that person with every fiber of my being. If I am going to try to truly be honest with myself, to dig deep and figure out who I am to the core, well I know what I see, and I don't like it. So why would I want to find her?! There is no one...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

That is all I needed

17 November 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

Well, first EMDR session today. I am not sure about it quite yet, it is a little scary. We didn't deal with the worst yet, and I still had a pretty strong reaction to it. At the time, I felt anxiety, fear, and shakiness mostly, and some intense anger directed towards myself. I was getting pretty panicky about the whole thing. He didn't let...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Preparing for EMDR

15 November 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

Well unless things have changed, this Wednesday is my first EMDR session, and it is already bothering me. My t wanted me to decide which memory I was going to use during the session. I have been refusing to think about it all, and it was working for the most part. Well, I had to decide before our next session, and now that I allowed myself to go...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

I can't relate to anyone

26 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

I work at an elementary school with pre-k children. I take a college class one night a week, and that is the only time I socialize on a normal basis. Of course there are the family visits that I must partake in on special occasions. Then I have one friend that I talk to and visit about once every six months, and that I put off as long as possible....

Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

It's 2:00 in the morning

24 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

It is 2:00 in the morning, and yet here I am again. Boy, I am here a lot, I am not always here typing either, sometimes just reading trying to figure this life out. I think that is why I come here so much, trying to figure it all out and guess what it isn't working. I have all this shit going on in my mind, and can't seem to stop it so I...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 3 Comments

Reflecting

22 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

I was thinking about something that I did in therapy on Wed. I am not sure if there is a particular name for it, but he has me write down some negative thought on myself, and then write down whatever emotions and physical responses that I have within me. I continue to write the same thoughts down along with my response until the negativity that I...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 1 Comments

Being part of this group

21 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

Well, I thought that it was going to be a better day, and it was relaxing, but not so much better. I am not sure why I do it, but I tend to watch things that I know will trigger me. I guess it is seeing others react the same way I have to what happened to me, knowing that I am not alone in these feelings that I have. It is like seeing a reflection...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 2 Comments

Feeling alone and sad

20 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

It amazes me how I can have three beautiful children and a husband who loves me very much, but still feel so completely alone at times. Driving home tonight I got so sad. I have so much going on inside of me right now, I am feeling so much pain, but cannot share it with anyone. There is Pandys, and there is therapy, but there needs to be something...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 1 Comments

I hate what it does to me

19 October 2010

Posted by ChristineMarie in Memories, Pain, Thoughts all ...

I wonder if it would be bad in the healing process if I tried to not think about it all, if I try very hard to push it all away once it begins to come up. I have went over and over this, but my life is so different now. What happened was truly a lifetime ago, to a different person than I am now, so why can't I just let it go? I know that what...

Read Full Entry →

Icon 2 Comments

Ingz, bellachai and bj_bear like this

Back to blog home →