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Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

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lostinsideofme likes this

Randomness...

04 October 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Randomness, Therapy
Since my last blog. My nephew got hurt in football, i got to find out through a FB post. and my sister refused to answer her phone for me. I say refused because if you have time to update your FB status u have time to answer a phone or text, right?

But just a couple weeks ago she's calling me about my brother, day and night and I answered the...
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Please make it stop

30 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Therapy
I think i'm losing my mind. Or I've lost it and have just been pretending for some time now.

I can't take this anymore. I don't even know whats real anymore. Are all of these flashes real, or is my mind just leading me to believe that my whole life has been shit. I'm sure that somewhere in the recesses of my mind there has to...
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My chest hurts

29 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme  
my heart hurts... I hope its a heart attack.

Too bad thats just where all the emotions live. Its not really a heart attack, jsut an attack of the heart.

Make the emotions, feelings, stress, go away. just stop haunting me. get out of my body, get out of my mind, get out of my life.

Or kill me.

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When People Ignore me

29 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme  
Thanks to certain things, its so easy to see when people ignore you.

Its hurtful in a big way.

I'm already struggling. I come for support and people just ignore you.

Not on accident. Not because the room is crowded. not because they zoned out. They just are choosing to ignore you.

Thanks.

Note to self, don't interact with that...
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Thoughts that run through

29 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme  
Today at 8:30am so far that thoughts that have been streaming are.

The first time my uncle had sex with me, the last time he has sex with me. when I told him I was pregnant. Me sitting on my kitchen floor, scrubbing the floor. My sitting in my livingroom with a gallon of vodka drinking from the bottle, crying my eyes out after I told him.

I get...
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FB- The lot

29 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Memories
Sitting next to me in the car. Parked in a dark lot. I can hear myself thinking, why are we here. Something bads going to happen. Instinctively I grab at the door. When you ask what i'm doing I say I'm just going to throw this in the trash. U lean across me,pulling the door shut. U look up at my with your head on my lap and I shut down....
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I'm Throwing in the Towel

28 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Emotions
I'm done. I give. You can take me. I don't want to be the Devils plaything. I'm done.

$135 citation for talking on my cell phone, despite the fact that I wasn't on my phone. Harassment from the officer who literally forced me into my car.

Then when I'm finally able to go I'm late to my drs appointment and the guy...
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Just back from T...

27 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Therapy
Still not liking her at the moment. Some thing about seeing her just bring up so much anger in me, and she expects me to sit there and openup to her... not happening. And then today, something I wasn't expecting form her at all, sarcastic comments about what I have in my hands... Hmmm... not helpful.

Then I got the feeling like she was...
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A Game with the T

25 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Therapy
So due to my T dropping a bomb on me, my opinion of her and our relationship is not well at the moment. I've reverted to being this juvenille, testy little girl. I can't answer questions without her answering one. I deflect, redirect everything and then there is the testing. I know its silly because its my care and I should be in...
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And ur a Doctor?

24 September 2011
Posted by lostinsideofme   in My Stories
Ok so where to begin...


So I take my kids to the doctors yesterday morning, after working a 16hour shift and being up for a total of 20something hours.

I sit there with the two of them aggravating each other, waiting for over an hour for the doctor, even though this was the first appointment of the day...

When the doc finally comes in, i tell...
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lostinsideofme likes this

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Guide to my world

I put up a general *TRIGGER WARNING* for all those who read. This is me being as real as I can get, trying not to hold back. Working through memories and life's challenges in the aftermath.

Contents:
Randomness tends to have the most content, but I warn you, it gets pretty random.

When I find more courage, My stories, will have more content. For now walk with my through my therapeutic adventures and rants.

School sucks, but at least its finally over.

Emotions, Memories are full of raw emotion.

Recently I've been Exploring My Sexuality

Welcome to my world.~lost~

What I'm Pondering

How do you overcome something that has been ingrained in you? Is it possible, or is it like fighting against your genes?

How on earth do turkeys get their fat asses in the air?

If I evolved from a primate, how come I've forgotten how to climb a tree?

Who can fry an egg on a sidewalk? I can barely fry an egg in a pan.

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