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lostinsideofme likes this

I'm Back!

03 June 2013
Posted by lostinsideofme  
Its been a while since I've been here. And honestly I'm crying that I'm back. So many things have happened in the meantime. Both good and bad. Though everything right now feels bad...

Where to begin......

There is no good place to start. In truth, I'm struggling big time. I love my kids to death, and they are the only things...
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uggggghhhhhhh 2012

11 June 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme  
I hate this year. So many things have gone on.too many things.

The most recent being that I've abandoned my new found sexuality and returned to an ex. one of the good ones, but yup he's a male. after almost two years of not having a male partner I'm back again and genuinely happy. we took a vacation together. my first ever. we moved...
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Posted by lostinsideofme  
I just don't know anymore.

If I could describe the kind of emotional wreck I am i would say cranky, but not your average cranky. I'm cranky like a lady who tried all her life to get pregnant and is now pregnant with triplets in her third trimester still getting her period not being able to wipe her own ass in the bathroom because her...
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Breaking Down

06 March 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme  
I have no idea how I'm still standing anymore. I have been breaking down for over a year now and miraculously here i still stand. I don't know who to thank, or if I should thank anyone.

Everyday I wake up, it angers me. Everytime I open my eyes, I'm pissed. Why am I still here.

People tell me to look to God, and I just can't. I...
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I hate psychiatry

24 January 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Therapy
So. In the past 2 weeks i've seen the psychiatrist again, who refuses to give me meds, but instead refers me to a therapist and a DBT group. Not really liking this idea right now, but hey if thats how I have to get the meds I'll go along with it, right? wrong.... This psych doc is bullshitting me. She tells me if I go to therapy and start...
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M is back :)

18 January 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Exploring
So random... I got a message from M today. And if you don't follow my blog, I will enlighten you. M is the first lesbian "relationship" (Click for a brief description)

It was actually a good...
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Starting Therapy, Again :(

16 January 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Therapy
So. What can I say. My therapist of 3.5 years moved her practice to a different state in decemeber. The same week as one of my most difficult anniversaries, while I'm in the middle of a breakdown.

I thought I would cover myself my biting the bullet and going to see the psych doc to get some meds. Well, she refuses to give me meds and I...
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What Just Happened?

16 January 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme   in Exploring
So... Exploring is fun. But so so interesting. :blush:

I went to my good friends house yesterday or last night, just to hang out chill, watch a movie, drink, have a good time. Not sure what really happened, but I don't think she's as homophobic as she would like to present herself. :o:

So here I am trying to figure out how to get...
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Posted by lostinsideofme   in Exploring
I don't even know where to begin. If you follow me then you know this has been quite a process. But I guess I should say, here I am this AM after having spent almost an entire week with a girl I like, and feeling very satisfied (for now. I'm sure my high will wear off soon).

I think so far one of the hardest things I've faced while...
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Its Been A While

12 January 2012
Posted by lostinsideofme  
I'm back. Not refreshed, not renewed, but a little more broken.

I had to step away, everything was just taking me over. The emotions, the memories, the thoughts, I thought I was going to lose it and damn near did.

My T officially left the second week in december, So here I am being 1 month wihtout a T.
And surprisingly its not as bad as I...
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Guide to my world

I put up a general *TRIGGER WARNING* for all those who read. This is me being as real as I can get, trying not to hold back. Working through memories and life's challenges in the aftermath.

Contents:
Randomness tends to have the most content, but I warn you, it gets pretty random.

When I find more courage, My stories, will have more content. For now walk with my through my therapeutic adventures and rants.

School sucks, but at least its finally over.

Emotions, Memories are full of raw emotion.

Recently I've been Exploring My Sexuality

Welcome to my world.~lost~

What I'm Pondering

How do you overcome something that has been ingrained in you? Is it possible, or is it like fighting against your genes?

How on earth do turkeys get their fat asses in the air?

If I evolved from a primate, how come I've forgotten how to climb a tree?

Who can fry an egg on a sidewalk? I can barely fry an egg in a pan.

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