Pandora's Aquarium: A Flowering Rose - Pandora's Aquarium

Jump to content

Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

There is still plenty of time and spaces if you'd like to sign up for the Guest Speaker Chat scheduled for this Saturday!

Welcome to Pandora's Aquarium, a rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivor message board and chat room.
If you've been a victim of any type of sexual violence, you belong here. What you see below represents just a fraction of the resources and survivor support available. Register now to join our community and take full advantage of what this online support group has to offer you as you heal and recover, or sign in to remove this message.

You are not alone, we can support you as you heal, and you've made an important step toward recovery by reaching out. If you are unable to register or have any questions, please contact the staff or view our home page.

Guest Message © 2013 DevFuse

danusia007, blondie2002, SilentOnes and 2 others like this
Posted by FloweringRose  
Okay, so hopefully no one gets alienated by the mention of hypnosis. But it's a big part of what I do, so it can't be avoided.

My mom tried to get me to hypnotize a family friend today. All I feel is nervous and jumpy just thinking of it. I have to go into trance to get a good hypnotic state going; and NO I don't feel like going into...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Posted by FloweringRose  
I am so glad for the loving people here and in real life I have. There are truly some diamonds amongst all the people I've known.

Today I had some pretty bad flashbacks. It's weird, when I dissociate into that state I see it *so* clearly and feel it all over me; and then I revert back to "me" and I'm just fine. DID I guess....
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Ashamed of Me...

12 December 2010
Posted by FloweringRose  
I need to go back to therapy probably. I mean I posted I would for us a while back; SHOULD'VE. But was too scared.

Am still too scared.

But all I can feel is the depression trying to drag me back under. It just seems to affect so much of my life. The fact people drift away...that my mind gets all foggy and I can't bring myself to write,...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 2 Comments

My Mind Is All Foggy :(

10 December 2010
Posted by FloweringRose  
I can't tell what's reality half the time.

I just feel like I'm swimming through all these crazy thoughts, literally drowning inside my skin. I'm just this floating consciousness but it's not nice, it's like I have no feet so I can't stand and I just can't find anything solid to hold onto.

I think about how I have...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Posted by FloweringRose  
So after reading through a lot of my poetry, in the hopes I can salvage some of the hundreds of pieces into a real memoir, I noticed a phrase I use continuously in my poetry.

"I guess..."

It may seem unprofessional to some, or unpoetic to others. But I really have trouble taking this phrase out of certain lines.
Since for me honestly...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

If You Really Knew Me...

08 December 2010
Posted by FloweringRose  
If you really knew me, you'd see the pain buried underneath my eyes. You'd know that sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I'm too busy trying to calm myself out of a panic to truthfully answer the "how are you" you've just asked. And you'd know that I'm not keeping it from you because I don't care...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 5 Comments

Posted by FloweringRose  
I am tired of watching people slip out of my life, from dissociation, from distance, from time and from just dealing with all my emotions.

It is so hard sometimes for me to keep in contact with people. My social anxieties, my phone anxieties and often my email anxieties only make it worse. and when the depression gets and I feel like curling up...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Continued Anger...

05 December 2010
Posted by FloweringRose  
I think I'm going to officially duck off facebook soon. Why? It just makes things worse.

Now my dad's hanging out with girls my age. Can't even phone me or talk to me and yet he can talk to other girls who look like me, and my age??? He's 39, I'm 18..
The f**king pervert...

I don't need him in my life!!
I just...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Posted by FloweringRose  
So there's this event on facebook where to stand up against child abuse you change your dp to a favorite kid's show...and I took it as the perfect opportunity to introduce our contest and get people voting for Pandy's!

So I was ok with it...until I noticed through a friend's profile M, my ex, had changed his picture too.

The...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 0 Comments

Posted by FloweringRose  
I'm not brave enough to post this in the creativity forum. I don't feel like it's worth reading...
So I'll post it here. Since I kind of do want it heard.



They say don't remember the past.
But how can you not when the past is you in so many ways? When you crawl and stink of those treacherous acts? When you never breathed a...
Read Full Entry →

Icon 1 Comments

danusia007, blondie2002, SilentOnes and 2 others like this

Back to blog home →
  • 20 Pages +
  • « First
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6
  • 7
  • Last »

← May 2013 →

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
1920212223 24 25
262728293031 

Recent Entries

My Blog Links

Mark Blog as read
Archive

Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.