There is still plenty of time and spaces if you'd like to sign up for the Guest Speaker Chat scheduled for this Saturday!
Welcome to Pandora's Aquarium, a rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivor message board and chat room.
If you've been a victim of any type of sexual violence, you belong here. What you see below represents just a fraction of the resources and survivor support available. Register now to join our community and take full advantage of what this online support group has to offer you as you heal and recover, or sign in to remove this message.
You are not alone, we can support you as you heal, and you've made an important step toward recovery by reaching out. If you are unable to register or have any questions, please contact the staff or view our home page.
But really..why can't it? I confirmed with mom a memory of ducking down in the theater at godzilla...I had it scot on. I also confirmed to my grandmother that indeed I HAD been left at my dad's alone after the age of 2, because I remember these game times that happened that only ended when I was 6 or 7...all the nightmares. I don't remember the game times really, except one where we wrote a book together (which was happy) and one where this girl kept walking into the wall (sad/scary feelings with it). But I do remember I had those times and as the nightmares got worse, I got more and more scared to go to that place...and everyone saw how anxious and upset I was so my mom sat me down and asked "Cassandra do you not want to go to Yaya and Papo's with daddy anymore?" and I said a fast "No!" without even thinking. It said right to say no for some reason, but at the same time I felt really bad like I was letting them all down and didn't love them enough. As soon as I did they got so enraged my dad moved away and they wouldn't talk to me again for years...
Bubbie confirmed this all as true, even though she originally thought it wasn't. I can't remember other things now, but there's been other childhood memories I have confirmed that I just "knew" were true.
So if I just know these are true too..
Why can't they be?
It makes me sick just saying that.
All I'm saying is even with the memory gaps and the fact I can remember some good things..that the bad things could be there too, and I'm just denying them...for whatever reason I am inside..
Hopefully I can figure this all out some day, the reality =/